Taylor
I always am, but it’s nice to know you worry about me.
Knox
I don’t worry about you. I don’t even know you.
Taylor
We should fix that.
What’s your favorite color?
I snort a laugh even though he can’t hear it. I need to put my fucking phone down, but my fingers start moving across the keyboard of their own volition.
Knox
All the questions you could ask, and you go for my favorite color?
Taylor
Figured it was a softer place to start than, ‘Do you like dick?’
Knox
Goodnight, Taylor.
Taylor
That wasn’t a no…
Go to fucking sleep,Knox,I plead with myself.But the plea goes unanswered because I’m too busy answering Taylor instead.
Knox
It wasn’t a yes, either.
Taylor
Okay, so we’ll call it a maybe.
I don’t respond…butmy fingers clutch my phone as if it were the thing feeding me oxygen or the only means of filtering poison from my blood.
Because even if it’s only temporary, someone wants me, and each message sends a hit of dopamine straight to my system, slowly filling a tank that’s been empty for quite a while.
Taylor
I bet I can convince you to give it a try.
Still, I hold strong and type nothing. Taylor’s most likely drunk, regardless of what he says, and will regret this whole conversation in the morning.
That’s a lie, my brain chides. Even after only a handful of interactions, I know without a doubt that Taylor Landry lives with no regrets. Part of me envies him for that, but that way of life will continue to evade me, because I’m great at regretting things. In fact, I regret a lot of things.
Like opening this can of worms.
My phone dings again, and my eyes are immediately drawn to the screen.
Taylor