Page 57 of My Super Sexy Spy
Her shoulders slumped and she reached for the tea, which gave me this weird sense of pleasure. Like through that simple task I was able to give her some of the comfort she deserved.
Walking around the island, I gave her shoulders a rub and she groaned and rolled her neck.
“Hey, no groaning,” I said into her ear. “I’ve kept my hands to myself for over a week out of respect for your grief, but a man can only go so far.”
“Sorry. You’ve been really patient with me. With everything. The USB, Gino. And what about your bosses? I know they’ve been calling you.”
I shrugged and dropped my hands. “My former bosses,” I clarified. “They don’t have a say in this. Unless you’ve changed your mind.”
“I don’t want to make any decisions until…well…until it happens.”
I gave her a kiss on the back of her head. “I think that’s a good idea. Why don’t you go get some sleep? I’ll set the alarm for his next dose.”
“I should do it,” she insisted.
“You haven’t slept a full night this whole week. Go, let me do this for you. If I can’t make you feel good, at least I’ll know you got some decent rest.”
She climbed off the stool and I could see the lethargy in her body. Getting to know Gino while grieving him at the same time had taken its toll on her. She wrapped her arms around my waist and rested her cheek on my chest.
I folded my arms around her and hugged her close. It was strange because I couldn’t remember the last time I’d done anything like this. Hugged a woman without any sexual intent, but rather to offer comfort.
I was in the line of work I was in because I was a hard-ass. A loner. I didn’t need human connections and messy emotions getting in the way of some of the hard decisions I had to make.
People were tools or enemies or both.
They weren’t whatever Beth was becoming to me. Someone I made tea for. Someone whose shoulders I rubbed. Someone I wasn’t fucking because it seemed wrong in this quiet house where a man was slowly dying in his bed.
“Off to bed,” I ordered a little gruffly.
“I don’t know what I would do without you this past week, Liam,” she said, squeezing me even tighter, which oddly I felt around my heart.
“You would have done much of the same. Just without the tea and the extra gun.”
She laughed a muffled sound against my chest, and I had to push her away, otherwise I was going to do something really disgusting and ask her to spoon with me in bed. Or maybe worse, ask her to be my girlfriend.
“I’m serious. Go now, before you fall asleep standing up.”
“Okay.”
She lifted her face to me as if waiting for me to kiss her. Another habit we’d developed. A peck on the lips before sending her off to bed. A gentle kiss to leave her with good thoughts for the night.
Like warm tea and shoulder rubs, it was meant to comfort.
I took a step back and shoved my hands into my pockets. Looking away from her, I mumbled something about finding my phone so I could set the alarm. I didn’t want to see the disappointment in her face after such obvious rejection.
Affection. Comfort. Feelings.
None of that I was comfortable with, never had been, until Beth. I was better off when I was lying to her or fucking her senseless. Those things I understood.
“Okay. Goodnight.”
“Night.” I was an asshole. But maybe it was better she began to understand that now.
* * *
Beth
ME:Hey, you there?
