Page 59 of Salvaged Heart
“I trusted you.” She whispered. “I told you he would find a way to get to you and poison you against me.”
“Laurel,” I sighed. “It’s not like that, not like that at all. Anders has never spoken badly about you. Your father and stepmom have put this all in your head. You just need to give him a chance to explain his side of things.”
“I’m not interested in hearinghisjustification for choosing drugs over his sister. I needed him. He wasn't there. Then he left me. There is no excuse for something like that.”
Anders had said his sister never knew what really happened to him that night, that it had all been kept a secret from her, and a part of me hadn’t believed it. A part of me clung to the idea that after all this time had passed, Laurel must have learned the truth or at least enough of it. But it dawned on me, at that moment, how wrong I'd been.
“You don’t know what happened that night, do you? The real reason Anders wasn’t there.”
She shot me an incredulous look. “And you do?”
“Yes, he told me.”
“I’m sure he did. Enlighten me, then.”
“I think you should give Anders a chance to tell you this story himself.”
It wasn’t my place to tell. He'd told me about Jonah in confidence. It hadn’t seemed like he had shared that part of him with anyone else before. Giving away that piece of him now to his sister seemed like a breach of confidence, but I wasn’t surewhat other option I had. Laurel was on a war path that wouldn’t end anywhere good. Once she had the bit between her teeth, nothing was stopping her, and I couldn't risk her hurting Anders further.
“He had his chance earlier, but he didn’t take it. You know why, Beckham? Because deep down, he knows everything I said to him was true.”
I let out an exasperated sigh, trying to piece everything together in my head. Finding a place to begin was difficult when I didn’t know what little she already knew. She looked back at me, impatience and something akin to disbelief all over her face.
“Do you remember Jonah Benson?”
Whatever she'd been expecting me to say, it wasn’t that, but recognition lined her green eyes. “Anders’ weird stepbrother turned lover? How could I forget? The two of them were inseparable. Well, until Jonah disappeared off to a college out West and never came back. Anders moped for weeks. He was insufferable.”
College, fucking college. She couldn’t be serious.
“He didn’t disappear, Laurel. He overdosed and died in Anders’ arms seven years ago.”
Her lips parted, ready to spit something back at me, but she slammed them back closed before trying again. “That can’t be true.” The voice she spoke in now a complete contrast with the one she used just a moment earlier. Pain lanced through her face. “I would know if that was true.”
“That was why he forgot to come pick you up from camp. That was where he was, where your parents were, trying to cover up the fact that Anders had been there when it happened…that he was high, too.”
The second the last words left my mouth, I knew they were a mistake. Laurel would cling to them over everything else she just learned because they fit the narrative she already had inher head. She pulled herself back up, squaring her shoulders slightly, the momentary look of regret evaporating from her face.
“Anders is an addict, Laurel. Jonah was, too.”
“Anders isn’t an addict. He is just another rich party boy who refuses to be responsible for his actions. If what you told me about Jonah was true, you would think that would be enough to get his ass in gear. But no, that shows you what little fucks he gives about people.”
“Do you know where he's been the last seven years?”
“No, why would I? He never called, never answered my texts, never thought to check in and see how the sister he left behind was doing. All he cares about is himself.”
“Laurel, Anders was homeless before he came here. He was completely lost to his addiction, doing a lot of fucked up shit to get by. Neither of us could see it, but all the signs were there. He was just really good at hiding them.”
I thought back to the first time I’d met him. A completely broken man stood before me, a false smile plastered across his hollow face and something dark and troubled in his eyes. He’d taken my breath away even then, but it was nothing compared to how he looked at me now. The way his genuine smile stopped my heart in my chest, the force of it enough to burn me alive.
“Well, he seems fine now.”
“He is a long way from fine, Laurel, but he is getting better. He is sober, getting healthier and stronger by the day. It’s been a lot of hard work on his part, but he is finally beating this thing.”
My heart warmed with pride at the thought. Anders was doing so well. He'd set his mind to it and hadn’t faltered even on the hard days. There was this new strength in him. Gone was the fake cockiness he wore for the world, theI don’t give a fuckattitude, and in its place was this resilient, courageous, affectionate man, and God, did I love him.
“I don’t know if I can believe you. There are years of hurt I can’t just forget about. Even if everything you’ve saidistrue.”
“I know. I don’t expect you to. But please, Laurel, you have to give him a chance. You need to go back in there and try to…” her face told me not to finish that sentence.
