Page 96 of Full Tilt
“I haven’t told anyone what happened, Jen.” Collins takes my hand in her soft palm and squeezes gently. “Are you doing okay? You’ve been through a lot. There are people you can speak to if you need to talk about what happened with Ethan.”
I shake my head again. “I have a feeling if Tommy hadn’t been there, then I would need way more help.” My voice fails a little on the final word. “I just hope my version of events is enough to vindicate Tommy. He doesn’t deserve to have his career cut short, like his dad.”
“You did the right thing, babe,” Collins confirms. “Even if he bailed on you the morning after, like a complete A-hole.”
We watch on from the open plan kitchen as Jack passes around early scan photos he and Kendra got because they couldn’t wait to see their baby. I’m so fucking happy for them both. Kendra is glowing, and Jack looks like he could take on the world with his smile alone.
I think that’s the beauty in a true friendship—no matter how much shit you have going on in your own life, seeing your best friend realize a dream in their life can fill your own with joy.
“He’s a complex person,” I reply to Collins. “He’s closed off because he’s damaged and confused.” My response was intended to be an explanation, but it sounds more defensive than that.
She turns to face me fully as I turn my back on the rest of the room. The entire Blades team is here—minus Tommy—and I want my conversation with Collins to be private.
“He made a comment about his mom and caring what she thinks of him,” I continue. “Something tells me we aren’t the only ones wishing we had a different deal with parents.”
She takes a sip of her drink, swallowing slowly. “From what I hear about Alex Schneider, I can’t imagine life has been all peachy for Thomas.”
I go to reply, but she continues, “That said, we all get dealt a bad hand in life from time to time. Doesn’t mean we can treat people badly and use them, like he has done with you.”
Her statement sticks in my throat, making me want to gag. She’s effectively validated my fear that Tommy only wanted sex to prove a point that he could bed me. And I fell for it.
“You really think that?” I ask, hoping she’ll change her assumption.
Both brows rise into her hairline as she shifts her weight from one foot to the other. “Listen, Jen. Aside from my own dad and the men on Kendra’s and Darcy’s arms, I’ve only ever met one decent man—the one I now call my husband. The vast majority seem to think it’s their God-given right to behave like the world—and all women—owe them something. When in fact …” She pauses her rant, cocking her head to the side.
Collins isn’t looking at me any longer as her gaze travels behind me.
“What’s the matter?” I ask, noticing her brown eyes as they grow wider.
“Jenna.”
At first, I think I’m dreaming when Tommy’s voice filters over my shoulder.
“Look at me, Jenna.”
The second time he speaks, I know for sure he’s here, and I turn to face him.
God, he looks amazing. So good that it pisses me off. An asshole has zero right to be this handsome. He’s unshaven and wearing all black, his dark hair messy and falling over intense eyes.
Even though there’s a party going on, everyone has fallen silent as they watch on. It’s something I’ve noticed when it comes to Tommy—when he enters a room, people stop and take note. At first, I thought it was out of fear for what he might do or say next. Now, I’m thinking it has more to do with his presence. I’ve never met a guy like him before, and I’m betting that’s the same for the vast majority of people he comes into contact with.
Tommy’s eyes briefly dart around the room and then fall back on my face. His gaze is soft and kind, almost pleading.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, my voice low and gravelly.
He just offers me a cocky grin. “I got invited to the party, and you know how much I love to socialize.”
Despite myself, I can’t help a smile. “I told you on voicemail that you’d never hear my voice again. You have zero right to be talking to me.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Collins move away, offering us some privacy. The rest of the room takes that as their cue to go back to their conversations.
“I know you did.” Tommy takes a small step toward me, and I feel every muscle tighten. His cologne is evident, and it transports me back to the last night we shared. “But you see, the thing is, Hellion … I don’t think I can live without the sound of your annoying voice in my life. The way it grates on me is addictive, and I love the fucking punishment.”
I can’t be sure if I’m breathing any longer when he moves even closer. The only breath I can feel is his.
“Or without my hands on you.” He continues edging closer to me, and I feel Tommy’s palm as heat permeates the thin material of my black dress, wrapping around my right hip.
He casts his eyes down my body and then back to my lips. “But most of all … I don’t think I can bear another second without telling you how fucking sorry I am for hurting you.”
