Page 85 of Level Up
Our beds, maybe…
That was stupid.I shouldn’t have said that. I can feel the seconds tick away before he responds: ten, twenty, thirty, forty-seven?—
SconesOfAyor:
Ok
Give me a sec
Call me when you’re ready
Ready to talk I mean
On the phone with me
With mouth-words
Or we don’t have to
My phone starts ringing on the desk in front of me and I grab it quickly, my heart rate spiking to panic levels. “Hello?” I say when I answer the call, as if I can’t see his name right there.
“Hey,” he says, and I hear the sound of a door softly closing in the background.
I think he went into his bedroom. I’ve never seen inside his bedroom, but he’s told me it’s full of Malcolm’s sewing stuff—bolts of fabric and half-finished costumes lying around, a desk with a sewing machine, a rickety ironing board in the middle of the room that Damien trips over every morning.
He mutters a couple of choice words under his breath, and I think he’s just tripped on it now. Like he didn’t turn the light on when he came in.
Oh my god.
“Hey,” I echo quietly, though I stay frozen in my desk chair. This was a terrible idea.
“What did you want to talk about?” There’s a creak of a mattress, like he’s just sat down, and the rustle of clothing on sheets.
“Oh, uh—” I have to clear my throat. “I didn’t have anything in particular in mind.”
“No?” His smirk is apparent in his voice.
“H-How are you?” I start picking at some of the peeling laminate on the edge of my desk.
“I’m good.” More creaking and rustling.Is he lying down?“Great, actually. How are you?”
“I’m good…” I reply uncertainly.
“Maybe we should talk about last night,” he adds, and my hand freezes mid-pick.
“Okay…”
“I realize I did the thing you were afraid I would do,” he says, and I nod even though he can’t see me. “But you seemedreally nervous, and I just—It was late, and I was worried you’d think we had to rush something even though we don’t?—”
“It’s okay, I get it,” I tell him. And I do. “Looking back now, it was probably the right choice. But it felt awful at the time.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“I just never thought I’d be in a relationship where I was the one who wanted it more,” I say with a small, nervous laugh.
“Trust me, you don’t.” He laughs as well. “I’m just terrible at…all of this.”
“All of what?”
