Page 141 of Can't Get Over You
“Oh, Fee. You’re breaking my heart. Hang on.” A moment later, the noises dulled. “Okay, I’m in the bathroom. How are you?”
Guess she hadn’t done a very good job. “I’m freaking out.” Tucking the phone on her shoulder, she washed and dried her hands and headed back to her bed. “He might lose Cody over my stupid, impulsive lie.”
She had daily outings and phone calls with the boy, so yesterday, when the phone rang, she was surprised to see Jude’s face on the screen. After telling her about the Motion to Appear, he begged her not to blame herself. Yeah, like that was going to happen.
It’s totally my fault.
But he’d asked her to show up in court, and that was the very least she could do.
“You have to stop kicking yourself. If you hadn’t lied, Jude probably wouldn’t have gotten custody.”
“That’s true. So how do I fix it? How can I help?”
“You tell the truth. The reason you did it, your feelings for both of them, the kind of father-figure Jude is... I mean, that’s all you can do.”
“You make it sound so simple, but this judge already hates him.”
“The judge wants what’s best for the boy, I promise you that.”
“I just… Why can’t I think straight? What’s wrong with me?”
“I don’t know why you’re so hard on yourself. You’ve been through a lot of upheaval. All you need is some time.”
“Yeah, but look what I do with my time.” She stuttered out a laugh. “I moved out of my house the day after I got an offer.” In fact, she’d told the realtor to keep scrolling down her wait list until she found someone who could move in right away. Within an hour, they’d found someone willing to pay cash, buy it as-is, and close quickly. Until the money hit her bank account, she’d be living in her old bedroom. “I walked away from the only man I’ve ever loved, and I hurt a little boy in the process.”
“I don’t think it’s unreasonable for you to have an identity crisis. There was the you before Jude, and the you after. I think it’s fair to give your mind a few days to catch up with your heart.”
“But when it finally does, do you think he’ll still want me?”
“Girl. Seriously?” Willa asked. “What did he send you today?”
She got up to look at the delivery cards she’d tacked to her old corkboard.
Miss you,
J
That was for the week of prepared meals that the gourmet store had delivered.
Stopped by for more cocoa and saw this. Take a bite of each one and tell me your favorite.
J
That one came with a giant box of chocolates from Coco’s. Good girl that she was, she’d done as she was told and taken a bite of each one. It would’ve been so much more fun to do it with Jude, all snuggled up in bed, wearing pajamas, lamplight casting a yellow glow on her white duvet.
But she hadn’t let him know her favorite.
She should’ve, though. She should’ve given him something.
But as much as she missed him, as much as she believed he loved her, there was just a tiny thorn lodged in her deep tissue, a reminder that he might only want her because of the situation.
“Today, I got a spa basket. It has foot scrub, nail polish, a face mask, a candle, bath salts, and some pink rubber duckies.”
“Pink…what? That came in the basket? That’s so cute. My dad should offer that to his guests. Where did it come from?”
“He put it together himself.”
I got it wrong last time, so I’m trying again. This one’s from my heart, not my wallet.
