Page 138 of Can't Get Over You
Fuck that.“It’ll go in the next house we buy together.”
Chapter Thirty
Jude was devastated.There was no other word for it.
Fear shadowed him, a constant presence. But he fought like hell because he couldn’t give in to it. Not when he had a little boy in his care.
They’d been living with his dad for two days now, and they’d kept busy, ice-skating in Wild Wolff Village and grabbing milk-shakes at the Hole in the Wall diner. Today, he’d built a bonfire for the two of them in the backyard, and they were making s’mores.
Even bundled up in parkas and wool hats and the blankets Jude had thrown over them, it was still freezing.
With a sticky hand, Cody tapped his leg. “Mister?”
“Yeah?”
“What happens when you go?”
“Go where?” When he prodded the fire with a long stick, sparks flew into the frigid air. Because of all the changes—moving and not living with Finlay anymore—he’d decided to work from home till after the New Year. “I’m not sure what you mean.”
“You know, like Grandpa’s gone and Miss O’Neill’s gone. When you’re gone, who do I have?”
It hit so hard, it knocked the air out of his lungs. He was stunned. He couldn’t answer. A dozen thoughts came to mind—all of them empty words of reassurance. But he’d worked hard to earn this boy’s trust, and he couldn’t promise a future with any of them. He didn’t knowhisfuture with Finlay or whether he’d get to adopt Cody.
But damn, the idea that his little boy lived with such frightening thoughts tore him up inside. Heart aching, he hauled the boy onto his lap. “Your grandpa’s getting better every day, and I know he can’t wait to get back to you. And Miss O’Neill’s not gone. You see her and talk to her every day.” And while he couldn’t make promises, there was one thing he knew to be true. “And me? I don’t want to be anywhere else but with you.”
The boy sat perfectly still, and Jude wished he knew what he was thinking. It didn’t seem like he’d soothed Cody’s worries. He tipped the boy’s chin so he could look into his eyes and feel the sincerity of his words. “I love you, Cody. I don’t know what the future holds, but I can promise you, I will do everything in my power to keep us together forever.”
The boy held his gaze, studying, weighing, deciding. Finally, he gave a barely noticeable nod.
“And I’d sure appreciate it if you didn’t call me Mister anymore.”
“What should I call you?”
“It’s up to you. You can call me Jude…”
The little boy cocked his head. “Can I call you Dad? Like I did that guy who’s you ’cept in another place?”
Whoever got to raise this beautiful, sensitive, smart boy would be the luckiest guy in the world.It better be me. “Yeah, Cody. You can call me Dad. I’d like that a lot.” He hugged him and kissed his temple.
“Is it time to go to Amy’s yet?”
Jude burst out laughing.Guess he’s okay. “No, not yet.” When he’d brought him onto his lap, the blankets had slipped off, so he snatched them from the ground and settled them over them again. “Is it too cold? Do you want to go in?”
“No. I just don’t want to be late.”
“I won’t get you there late. We’ll leave in half an hour.” As hard as he tried, he couldn’t stop thinking about Finlay. He held on to hope by his fingernails. He would not succumb to doubt. He wouldn’t allow himself to entertain the idea that she’d decide to move on without him.
She wouldn’t. A love like theirs? Not a chance.
Still, every second that ticked by without a call from her threatened his sanity. Taking care of Cody tethered him, but it was hard because everything in this town reminded him of her. Of them.
Us.
There will always be an us. There’s no world where Jude and Finlay aren’t living in it as one.
Boots crunched on fresh snow, and a bag came flying, landing in his lap. Wyatt dropped into the Adirondack chair next to him.
Jude held up the beef jerky. “Thanks.”
