Page 29 of From the Ashes
He cost me everything.
My hand moves from his throat to cup his face, my other hand drops his hat in the dirt before joining its partner to hold him still.
Unable to fight the pull anymore, I throw caution to the wind and finally give in to what my body’s been begging me to do since I ran into him in that bar. Walker wastes no time pulling me against him, frantically wrapping his arms around me, one around my waist, the other hand clamped onto my back, holding on as if it were the rope that keeps him connected to the bronc. Our lips collide, tongues lashing and stroking each other as I suck on his lips, wanting him to wear the bruises of this kiss for the remainder of his time here.
Somehow, he tastes even better than I remember. I’m being pulled under, needing him so badly I’m grinding my hips into him, losing myself entirely in the way I’ve only ever done with him. He moves his hands to my ass, encouraging my rhythm, and I swear I’m about to come in my fucking pants. His muscular form is hard beneath my hands, and his sweat smells like dirt and wild animals, and I fuckingcraveit.
He’s everything I’ve been missing. In this moment, my anger has taken a backseat to my lust and I’m free to justfeel.
I wedge my thigh between his legs and moan into his mouth when he starts rubbing his dick along my quads.
“Oh,fuck, yes,” he whimpers against my lips, just as lost to the moment as I am. “Jesus Christ, I’ve missed you, Phoenix.”
It would be so easy to get lost in him, but soon, he’ll be back on the road and I’ll have to start all over with picking up the pieces again. The thought spikes my anxiety, which allows all my demons to return in full force.
With a groan of agony, I rip my mouth from his. I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t. Kissing him conjures up every ounce of rage and self-loathing I have, while pulling away from him feels like shards of glass are being ground into my stomach.
“Don’t go,” he begs, his hands tightening around my neck and digging into my waist.
The irony is too much. The last time we were together, it wasmebegging. Begging for him to stay. Begging for it to last just a little longer. Begging for him to give me more.
But he left then, and I have to leave now.
“I never should’ve come here tonight.” I manage to choke the words out as whatever was left of my heart leaves my body at the same time, determined to stay with the cowboy in front of me even as my body retreats.
Chapter 15
Walker
For a brief second last night, Phoenix was mine again.
If I’d thought reliving our memories was distracting, it’s gotnothingon making new ones. The scruff on his face was intoxicating, but the way he gripped me? It was like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to punch me for being there or worship me for existing. I’ve never experienced anything like it outside of him, and I expect I never will.
“Walker!” Jonas yells, making me jump.
“Jesus, Jonas, this camper isn’t big enough for you to have to yell that loud. What do you want?” I snap, looking at him from my spot on the couch.
“Apparently, Idohave to yell that loud when you don’t answer me the first four times I say your name.”
Oh.
“Well, you have my attention now,” I tell him.
“Do you remember what I told you? You won’t be on the same horse today, so your insider tips won’t help you. You need to lean back faster in preparation for the next buck. Evenwithyour questionable knowledge acquisition, you weren’t fully inposition when that last bronc kicked out and he almost bested you.”
“Why are you being so snarky?” I ask, untucking my legs and standing, moving through the camper to grab a bottle of water from the fridge. “I’d figure you’d be in favor of anything that gives me a leg up.”
“Not if it’s cheating,” Jonas fires back.
“HA!” I scoff in disbelief. “Cheating? You’re just pissed because Phoenix had information you didn’t. Had alotof information you didn’t, actually. It should have beenyougiving me that information because then it would have beencoaching, not cheating.” I don’t want to fight with Jonas, especially two hours before I ride, but he’s really grating on my nerves.
“What’s gotten into you?” he asks, sounding like a broken record.
“Nothing,” I reply, like a sulking teenager. “I just don’t understand why you went from practically wanting to suck Phoenix’s dick to this passive aggressive bullshit.”
Jonas slams his hands on the small kitchen table and stands up. “You know what? I’m heading in. Get your shit together and I’ll see you inside in an hour. You’ve been an asshole ever since we arrived, and I regret forcing you to ride here. The faster we can put distance between us and Phoenix Harding, the better.”
He lets the camper door slam shut on his way out. I slide into his vacated seat and drop my head into my hands.
