Page 55 of Keep Me Still
My face warms, and I take a deep breath before settling into the cushions. “It was kind of…a long time coming, you know? I mean, I pushed him out of my mind for so long that it just seemed natural to push him away. But…”
“But he won’t be pushed,” she finishes for me.
I nod, grateful that she understands. “Do you think I’m crazy?” I’m worried my changes of heart can’t be counted on one hand since Corin met me.
“Who the hell am I to judge you?” she asks with a sad smile, the one that hints at shame in her past. Maybe we have more in common than I initially thought. She’s wrong—we’re not opposites. At least, not completely.
“It just seems dangerous, and kind of scary, and so unlike me. But I’m tired of being afraid, you know?” I shrug, but my own words stab me in all me weakest places. “I want him, and life is short.”
“Uh, yeah, and he obviously wants you too. But he might be able to resist you tonight if you show up to the game looking like a corpse.”
She’s right. I need sleep. It’s still a few hours until the scrimmage. After casting a longing glance at Anna Kendrick on the screen, I struggle to my feet. “Wake me up in an hour?”
“How about two hours?” Corin suggests.
“Yeah, okay. Sleep is my friend.”
Collapsing onto my bed, I grab my phone so I can set an alarm in case she falls asleep, too. I am not the only one who appears to have been up all night. When I unlock the screen, there’s a text.
Can’t stop thinking about tonight.
Heat sparks in my center, flowing outward until the darkened room is nearly glowing.
Me either. It’s been so long since I’ve seen you play. I’ll see you at the arena.
His response takes a few seconds so I go ahead and set my alarm.
Yeah, that too. Rest up. Might be a long night.
Oh Lord, help me, this boy. And I’m wet just thinking about him, but I’m sore too, so hopefully he’s not completely serious. Definitely going to get some rest just in case.
~FUTURE TENSE: Used to mark an event not having happened yet but expected to happen in the future. Or that tense feeling you get when you let yourself have hopes of a future in spite of everything.~
We’relining up to be announced individually when I catch sight of Layla and Corin coming down the bleachers out of the corner of my eye. My girl is carrying a humungous Coke and stepping carefully down the metal steps, looking even more radiant than ever. Thoroughly fucked looks so damn good on her. It’s a struggle for me to remain still.
Even from far away, she feels me watching and turns to look. Grinning like an idiot, I wink and nod at her, warming at the way she grins back. I can tell even from here that she’s blushing. Looking for the entire world like she knows something secret and special about me. Because she does. She knows what my mouth feels like between her legs, how my dick fits perfectly inside of her, and what flashes in my eyes as I come…inside of her.
For a second my knees threaten to go weak beneath me, but a sharp elbow in my side rips me out of my fantasy. “What the piss, man?” I hiss at Skylar as the booming voice on the PA system begins announcing our names and positions. I won’t give him the satisfaction of rubbing my side to ease the sting, but I’m getting his ass back later.
“You were having a wet dream so I thought I should wake you.”
After the scrimmage ends, Corin and Layla wait for us outside of the field house. I’m feeling pretty damn good, because even though I didn’t outscore Taite, he only beat me by one goal. It’s a hell of a lot better than I’ve been able to do in practice, so I’ll take it.
Corin is smiling at Skylar like they have a secret, though he admitted they didn’t sleep together. Now I’m kind of wondering what they did do, especially when he puts an arm around her like it’s the most natural thing in the universe. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him be affectionate with a girl unless he was trying to get her number to schedule a hook up.
“Landen, you want to explain what this is all about?” Layla barks, yanking my attention to her, not that it wasn’t headed there anyways.
“What is it, babe?” I ask, leaning down to kiss her on the mouth. Because I fucking can.
But her lips are barely responsive, and she’s holding a copy of the soccer media guide like it’s a dead animal. She thrusts it at me and I read the page containing my picture.
Perhaps Southern California State’s greatest acquisition this season is Landen O’Brien, who turned down offers from several professional teams to walk on as the team’s second string striker.
More shit about me moving around a lot because of my dad, and so on. Oh hell. “Yeah, it’s my bio.” I shrug like it’s no big deal. “I didn’t write it. The media chick did after she talked to my mom.”
“Ryan Landen O’Brien, you better start explaining yourself right now,” she demands, glaring at me with everything she’s worth.
“We’re gonna give you two a minute,” Corin says, pulling Skylar away.
