Page 64 of To Go Against Her Heart
The next morning, Elizabeth found herself in the parlor, struggling to compose herself, and she was conscious of Jane’s steady gaze upon her and the man seated next to her. None of them in the household expected to see Darcy the very next morning, after they dined at Lord Matlock’s residence. Her uncle was the least surprised by his arrival, as he had suspected since meeting Darcy that he was determined to win Elizabeth’s hand.
“Good morning, Mr. Gardiner. I wanted to call on Miss Elizabeth if she is not otherwise engaged at this hour,” he had said confidently as he arrived in the Gardiner house around half past ten.
Had he witnessed even the slightest hint of displeasure on Elizabeth’s face,Mr. Gardiner would have acted otherwise. However, when he saw nothing but surprise and how her eyes brightened upon Darcy’s arrival, he left her with him in the parlor with Jane acting as a chaperone.
“I hope I did not interrupt your occupation this morning,” he asked Elizabeth with sincerity.
“Not at all as I am quite unengaged at the moment.”
“Your cousins do not need you?”
“They are with their nanny but may join us soon. May I dare to ask, why Miss Darcy did not accompany you?”
“Am I to understand that you do not favor me coming alone?” he asked, his eyes fixed on her face.
“That is not true. I am merely surprised.”
“I must remind you, Miss Elizabeth, that if I am calling on you without my sister, it is because you permitted me to do so; unfortunately, some acts cannot be reversed. I suggest you think twice before giving me consent next time,” he said, making Elizabeth blush.
“And what are you reading this morning?” Darcy asked, eyeing the book in her hand, and Elizabeth found the change of subject a welcome relief. As Elizabeth explained what had first drawn her to the work and why she was rereading that particular story, Darcy listened with interest, captivated by her reflections on the tale and her discernment of its characters.
“I am tempted to reveal how the story ends, Mr. Darcy, but if you wish to, you could borrow it and let me know if you find it as interesting as I do,” she said, and handed him the book, whichDarcy took readily.
Despite Jane’s presence, the couple conversed without hesitation, and Darcy could not help but rejoice in the outcome of his decision to see her that morning, without the company of Georgiana. He had made his intentions open not only to Elizabeth but also to her family.
Jane observed them in the same room with overwhelming happiness for her sister. However, in the corner of her heart, she could not ignore her own sentiments that surfaced after Darcy’s arrival. She knew that Mr. Bingley’s regard for her remained unchanged since Hertfordshire—it had been evident from the moment they first met again in London. However, Jane was conscious that she had subtly hinted to him that she no longer wished to see him in town. Suddenly, she felt a strange sensation in her heart, a mixture of helplessness and longing that engulfed her mind and body as she came to terms with her own folly in her relationship with Mr. Bingley. Jane did not doubt that he had no involvement in Miss Bingley’s schemes, nor did she have any suspicions about the sincerity of his apology.She saw,with some mortification, that in seeking to punish him by her avoidance, she had suffered most from her own resentment. As tough as it was to accept, Jane finally realized that she had behaved spitefully, without understanding the repercussions of her own actions. Now, everything looked hopeless to her as she understood that she had made Mr. Bingley believe that she no longer cared for him.
Darcy’s arrival that morning reminded her of all the numerous occasions Mr. Bingley had called on her in Longbourn. As disheartening as it was, Jane now understood that she had pushed away everything her heart had always yearned for, and the very thought of returning to Hertfordshire now devastated her. Her thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of her cousins, and Darcy immediately engaged with them, much to their delight. Among three young children, Darcy seemed to look a lot younger in his manner, and Mrs. Gardiner pressed him to stay for dinner, which he politely refused. When he took leave, he looked at Elizabeth.
“I hope you would be less surprised if I call on you again tomorrow,” he said with a smile, not caring if anyone heard it.
Elizabeth watched him depart, her book in his hand—and, if she were to confess honestly, not merely her book, but her very heart seemed to follow him in his carriage.
***
“Brother, was she surprised? Did she enquire as to why I did not accompany you?” Georgiana asked as soon as Darcy returned.
Before leaving that morning, Darcy had explained that he wished to call on Elizabeth alone, and the young girl was not ignorant enough to misunderstand his intentions.
“Yes, she was. The first thing she enquired about was you.”
“I assumed so; shall I invite her to dine with me tomorrow?”
“I do not know her plans, but maybe I can ask her when I call on her tomorrow,” he said with a wink.
However, Georgiana was unwilling to stay home again the next day and spent the next half of the day arguing about the same thing.
Meanwhile, at her uncle’s house, Elizabeth tried to process everything that had happened that morning.
His intentions appear quite clear, and he must be aware of my regard for him. What is to happen now? Will he eventually ask about my past? What if he does not? Am I equal to the task of revealing my past to him?
Although several questions haunted her, she did not fail to notice Jane’s demeanor.
“You have looked troubled since morning, Jane. Is something the matter?” she asked out of concern.
“No, nothing is, I assure you.”
“Do not lie to me. What is it? I am certain it is something regarding Mr. Bingley,” Elizabeth pressed, and to her horror, Jane started sobbing.It had been many weeks since Elizabeth had beheld her in such emotion.
