Page 101 of Jase
“Right.” He stood, shutting his laptop. I saw the confliction. He was practically wincing as he left the device and walked to the fridge. He pulled out the juice, opened the lid, and finished off the carton in one long drink. His arm lowered, and he slowed. “Did you want some?”
“For crying out loud.” I headed for our room, feeling him right on my heels as I broke through the threshold.
“Whoa. What’s wrong? Are you mad at me?”
He barely had the door closed before I spun and lunged in his direction. “Mad? I’m trying not to be. Do you not remember the argument we had before? I’m doing everything I can to keep it together and be supportive of you, but I don’t think I’ve had a good night’s sleep in over three weeks. You wake me up multiple times, at every hour imaginable. You eat my bananas.You drink all my juice.You even stole my razor from the shower to shave your face, and then threw it away. I order the groceries. I make huge meals now every night because you refuse to let any of us, including the agents, order out. I’m tired, Jase. I’m tired, and neglected, and I want to go back to the way things were.” My bottom lip stuck out at the sadness. “With the house.With us.”
“They will.” He let out a sigh, trying to pull me into his arms. I sidestepped just in time. “They will, love, I promise. I’m trying, here. I know how hard this is for you. It’s hard for me too. Trust me, I want to go back to normal just as much as you, but we can’t do that until this is over. You’re not safe if we stop now.”
“We’re never going to be safe,” I exploded. “What if you never find him? What if it takes ten years? I’m trying. I really am, but I’m alone. You said that wasn’t going to happen again. We barely even talk since you moved the FBI in. You stare at the screen for almost twenty hours a day. You’ve gone back to sleeping on the couch. That’s not how it’s supposed to be.You made me a promise. We were so close, and things were finally getting good.”
Jase straightened. “Are you finished?”
“No.”
He took a step closer, reaching out to pull against the lining of my pajama shorts.
“Are you finished?”
I cut my eyes up, crossing my arms over my chest. My fingers ran over my scars that were once covered by the 3D cast. Even weeks later, I still wasn’t used to it being gone.
“It depends.”
His other arm wrapped around me, pulling me closer as he slipped his hand past my shorts. When his finger traced over my entrance, I placed my palms over his pecs.
“Just because I’ve been working doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about you.”
“Thinking isn’t doing.”
“No. It’s not.” His fingertip dipped inside, making me even wetter as he began to tease me with small thrusts. “I’ll start coming to bed at a more decent time. I didn’t realize how much I woke you up.” He pushed deeper. “And I’ll help cook.”
“And my juice?”
A smile began to form as he leaned in.
“You’ll have two new cartons first thing in the morning.”
“And this?”
Jase shifted his shoulders, easing a second finger inside to push deep. When I reached down his shorts and wrapped my hand around his hard cock, he moaned.
“Hearing V threaten you all like that. I think I must have lost my damn mind the last few weeks. We’re saving people almost just like you, Kody. Trafficked, kidnapped. God, that one red room was specializing in harvesting organs. Even those of children. I can’t help but think, David did everything else to you. Would he have…? Jase squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. “This man is bad news. He’s the worst of the worst. Seeing everything he’s running, the type of people he’s employing…it’s thrown me back to the mindset I was in when you were in the hospital. Back to being in that fear of losing you. I…keep seeing you lying there. You’re in my arms and you’re not breathing. Your skin is so pale, and your lips are blue.” He let out a deep breath. “He did that. He did that to you right here in this penthouse. In our home. I want him dead.Destroyed.I’m sorry. It’s time for a break for a few days. How does that sound?”
“Really?”
Jase frowned at the tears clouding my eyes. For a long moment, he didn’t speak. His fingers even withdrew. His free hand settled under my chin, easing my face higher.
“This is why you’re perfect for me. I need you to reign me in when I get like this. I told you you’d always come first. In my mind, I was so ready to catch this bastard and have you safe, I justified that as good enough. It wasn’t. You said neglect and you’re right. For that, I apologize. I know what you need; what we both need:rest. Give me a few minutes while I kick everyone the hell out of our house. Your screams are for my ears only.”
Rest. Did he say rest?
The door shut behind him, and I tore my shirt over my head, nearly falling over my shorts and panties as I tried sliding them down and running to the closet at the same time. He definitely said rest. Finally! I pushed the closet door open, kicking the damn, clinging clothes from my ankle.
“Toy. Tool. Toy. Tool.” My eyes scanned the shelves impatiently. I grabbed the white, silk pillow, feeling more excited than I had since the party. When I went to reach for the crop, I paused, my mind slowing as I took in a half-hidden tool we hadn’t used before. It wasn’t much different than the cat David had beat me with. It had a handle. It had strands. Where this one was leather with knots down the length, the cat David used had what looked like weighted barbed wire.
Slowly, I reached, picking it up. My heart was racing, and nausea hit as my past swept over me for the first time since I’d moved in with Jase. Just thinking about what I’d gone through was almost too much to take.
In a daze, I headed to the bed, placing down the pillow. My knees pushed into the soft material as I sat the tool in my lap. I kept my head down, staring at it, but not seeing the way it spanned over my thighs. I saw the brands on my skin. Blood. I saw the way my skin was jaggedly opened in places. I saw death at my front door. It was right there, and all I’d wanted to do was invite him in. Death could have taken me, and I would have gone freely.
