Page 11 of Shattered Heir
Stop thinking so violently.The words again floated to me, and I wasn’t sure for the third time if they were my own or not.
“Emma, Shad would do anything to protect you. I am sure you couldn’t have stopped him.”
“He was an idiot!” I screamed as I stood up. Mary looked at me, surprised, and Keil looked taken aback. I tried. Oh, how hard I tried to put the beast, the monster, back—to tame her, to soothe her back down. Where was mymelody?I searched for it, but my melody was gone. I closed my eyes, hearing their voices, but also hearing and feeling the bubbling of hatred swelling within me, and it—she—wanted blood. I didn’t know what was happening to my feet or to my body, but I was walking. I reached the door and made my way down to Shad’s room. I tried the handle: locked. I groaned in irritation and kicked the door. It didn’t budge; I kicked again, and I hit it with my shoulder.
Hands held me back. Someone covered my face with their hands, rubbing my cheeks, telling me that “it was okay—everything was okay—I’d be okay.”
Then there was a boy, the boy I hated more than anyone or anything else in this world, his black soulless eyes, and his—wait, it wasn’t the boy I hated; it was someone else. I felt the slight plink of a note inside of me pull toward him. My melody pulled itself free from the deepest, darkest parts of me, where it had hidden itself. Slowly, as if it was afraid that I would burn it, it unfurled, one note at a time, until it reached me. I locked onto those black eyes, that perfect face, and finally, my soul was released, and the monster was back where she belonged, locked away in her cage, but still ever-present inside of me, ready to strike at any unstable moment.
“Emma!” I heard the screaming first. Mary was touching my face, and I turned to look at her. Keil was holding my arms back, and I shook my head before moving away. I tore off my necklace for a moment so that they could sense my melody, and they looked up at me quietly, nodding, and then they let me go. I closed my eyes.
“What just happened?” I asked, touching my head, feeling more confused than I had ever felt before. Mary looked to Keil, horror in her eyes.
“Emma, what was that? What is wrong? Did Cade do something to you, too?” Mary asked.
Shad just stood there in the doorway. He wasn’t smiling, wasn’t frowning; he was just watching, observing me.
“Did he do anything to me?” I spat out and tried to hold onto my melody, but it was slowly slipping away again. The cage around my beast was slowly unlocking, bars dissolving where they once held firm. Fires of hatred burned within my soul.
“Mary, she is losing herself to corruption. Anger and hatred are consuming her,” Keil said as he pulled Mary back into the room. Keil came back, and I tried to breathe, to focus on the music inside of me. I tried desperately to get the creature backinside her cage, to hang onto my melody, but again—my melody—it was gone, and the cage was, too.
“Emma, calm down, everything is okay. We all feel upset. You have every right to be upset,” Keil said as he touched my shoulders.
I flinched, but he never let me go. I looked at him, the wrinkles around his face, the soft bone structure of his jaw. Keil was strong, wise, and brave.He is good; he did not do this to me.I tried to focus on his face, a face not similar at all tohis, to Cade’s.
“I don’t know what is happening,” I said through clenched teeth, still trying to pull my melody back out, attempting to find it.
“You are holding onto hatred. It is consuming you. You cannot let it do that to you. Your melody will die if you hold onto such feelings.”
“Die? He is dead?” I said, trying to focus on the words I heard. I wanted to kill Cade, too.What had he said?
“Yes, Emma, please, your melody will die.”
“My melody,” I said, looking at my chest, watching as it rose and fell. They were not talking about Cade; they were talking about me.
“I understand why you hate Cade. He upset us all because of what he did.”
“I want to kill him,” I said, letting the monster breathe fire backward, down my throat. The words stung and burned, and I liked it.
“I understand, but you can’t let hate consume you like this,” Keil said, breathing fast, his hands loosening their grip on my shoulders. Shad stood in front of me, and Keil moved away.
“Emma?” Shad asked, touching my cheeks with his palms.
Shad. He is beautiful, right in front of me; he is alive.He isn’t Cade. How could I think he was? This is Shad, beautiful-wonderful-Shad.My melody swarmed and sang and reachedout to him, but there was nothing there. I melted into his arms in disappointment. I clung to him for life, for strength, for everything. His one note sang inside of me, pulling out my melody, and I became lost within its beauty, in the sound, in the electricity within our touch. When he pulled away, I wanted to pull him back and kiss him. He stepped back and looked at Keil.
“I guess that works, although different,” Keil shrugged.
“What is wrong with her?” Shad asked. I would have found his concern thoughtful if not for the tone he used. He might as well have said: ‘why is she such a freak?’
The monster wanted to claw his face off, but it’s a beautiful face, so I shoved the monster back down. She obeyed, which surprised me, because I was so out of control only seconds before.I am a freak.“What is going on?” I asked, leaning against the wall.
You are not a freak, Emma. You have passion.I clung to the words inside of me, hearing them brought me hope.
“Emma, you need to train your melody,” Keil said.
“Train my melody?” I asked while panting.
“You need to train your soul’s melody so that you do not become corrupted by this hatred that you feel; it is trying to turn you into a monster. All it needs is a little seed, and it will grow and grow, until one day you will lose your melody forever. And then you will lose your mind—become soulless,” Keil said softly.
