General Half-Pint: Don be imbicile jealus man
You have no fucking idea.
Backspace. Backspace. Backspace. Delete. Hold.
We’ll talk about it later.
General Half-Pint: non hate jealous non soldeir I am roll my ey es
No need to roll your eyes and I’m not jealous. He shouldn’t be talking to you like that.
General Half-Pint: Oui I will smash bos s imbeclie cock
Smashing his cock could do it. But you know you can quit working now anyway. Your nephews are officially fucking rich.
General Half-Pint: Not take ezekil jean mone y I not ea rn it
Ezekiel didn’t earn it either, a horse did. ;)
General Half-Pint: Ha I laugh merci it felt so go od to lagh
;)
General Half-Pint: I feel beter now you gave me wink face. NO one else ner text me are only frineds I go to frezer not for icecream
It’s okay if I’m the only one. I’m the only friend you need, right? We can talk about why you go to the freezer and not for ice cream when you’re ready. Want me to come over?
General Half-Pint: Is okya just bad work I okay don have to come to me
Too late, General, I’m already jumping the fence ;)
SPRING 2006
General Half-Pint: Tyler, you are the best friend I’ve ever had in my life. You are so warm and kind. It comes from your eyes. I love the way you speak to me and listen to me. I don’t think a man has ever really listened to me before like you do. Maybe Ezekiel. You make me smile every day, even on bad days. You battle snow with me. You make my heart feel lighter. Free. I am so happy when I’m with you. Thank you for being the friend you are to me. I can’t say this to your face because of my brash, but I want you to know I care about you very much. I hope I make you happy too sometimes like you make me. I hope I am the same friend to you that you have been to me. I hope you take this text to your heart, my soldier, and know that you have changed my life in many good ways.
I’m so fucking in love with you. I’m trying so hard not to drop my wrench right now, fly to wherever you are and confess how much while trying to keep my shit together in front of the clowns surrounding me. I can’t stop thinking about the way you looked at me before we last parted. I want you so fucking much, but I’ll be as patient as you need me to be. I promise ... but please look at me that way again. Even if you don’t, I’ll wait for you for a dozen more seasons just for the chance.
Backspace. Backspace. Backspace. Backspace. Backspace. Delete. Hold.
General ... I’m blown away. That text was fucking perfect. How did you do that?
General Half-Pint: She asked me to text you for her. She really wanted to convey it right. Hi Tyler, I’m Michele.
Oh, hi.
General Half-Pint: Sorry, didn’t mean to make this awkward, but you should see the look on this woman’s face. She talked about you for a good ten minutes before asking me to text you for her. I don’t know what you’ve done to her, but if you have a brother, send him to the ABC liquor store off Main. I’m giving her the phone back now. Just thought you should know. Please don’t hurt her.
Never, and thanks.
General Half-Pint: Soldier is me delpine again I hope not embarses you qusetion mark
Fuck no. God no. Not embarrassed at all. That meant so much to me. But General, I’ll take your words any day. Your words mean just as much. Even if they aren’t perfectly typed, they are perfect to me. Okay?
General Half-Pint: Oui Is so much tex makee my brian exploed but I want you knw feel frmy my hart
We can’t have your beautiful brain exploding, now can we? And your soldier got your heartfelt message loud and clear. Can I come over?
General Half-Pint: I go t go work soo n sad face