Page 34 of Colin Gets Promoted and Dooms the World
“La playa,” I volunteered.
“—or asking for directions to the nearest pharmacy—”
“Wait, don’t tell me. Uh…¿Donde es la farmacia?”
“—you’ll be fine.”
I frowned at Lex while they smirked back. “Okay, you got me,” I said, biting off each word. “I’m not an expert researcher.” Then I softened my tone. “Which is why I could really use your help with this.”
Lex gave their mohawk another firm shake. “Look, dude, I may be a sucker for lost causes, but you’re asking for a lot here. I’m not interested in becoming your personal librarian, especially if it’s so you can end up in a corner office someday. If you want to become a corporate drone, that’s fine, but I hate that shit.”
I was about to respond when someone with an Australian drawl spoke up behind me. “Look who it is—Crenshaw’s golden boy.” Tamsin strolled into view, pausing at one end of our table. Effortlessly chic in high-waisted pants of apricot linen and a crisp white blouse ornamented with retro ruffles, she tilted her head to examine the book in front of me before subjecting Lex to a cool appraisal.“Slumming it in the stacks, I see,” she remarked as she looked at me with an unfriendly little smile.
“Who’s this?” Lex asked me, jerking their thumb in her direction.
“She works for Ms.Obiakaeze in Transportation,” I muttered. Then, to Tamsin, I said in a tone of forced politeness, “Can we help you with something?”
She tossed her head a little, making her long blond hair sway gently down her back. “Oh, I was passing through and saw you sitting here.”
I looked at the surrounding shelves. “Really? You just happened to be passing by an obscure corner of this enormous library?”
Tamsin’s smile didn’t waver. “After you ran off yesterday, Sunil told us so many fascinating things. Is it true you wear diapers?”
My face heated as I struggled to hold her gaze. “No, it’s not.”
A spark of malice glimmered in her pale eyes. “Really? Sunil said everyone on the sixth floor knows that you do.”
“I wouldn’t trust everything Sunil tells you,” I snapped, mortified and furious in equal measure. “He’s a sleazeball who assaulted me. And the woman who started that diaper rumor? I threw her into the Stygian Maw.”
Tamsin studied me warily. “I doubt that. Sunil says you’re a loser.”
“Hey, Crocodile Dundee? We’re working here.” Lex met her stare with a blandly hostile gaze of their own.
“Yes, I can see that. Fascinating stuff, too.” She picked up a book from the table and read the title embossed along its spine. “Ein praktischer Leitfaden zur Kindesentführung für diejenigen die keine Erfahrung mit Menschen haben. ‘A practical guide to childabduction for those inexperienced with humans.’ ” Letting it fall back to the table with a loud thump, she asked curiously, “Whatareyou working on, I wonder?”
“None of your business,” I replied defensively.
Lips curving into a superior little smile, Tamsin rested her hands on her hips. “Well, I’ll leave you to it. I’ve got big plans of my own, you know. Sunil and I have made a deal—we’re going to take those two positions in middle management for ourselves. If you’re smart, you’ll keep your head down like a good boy and let the grown-ups win.”
Before I knew what I was doing, I’d bolted to my feet, fists clenched so hard they quivered. “I’ll kill you both first!” I snarled.
“Whoa, hey, let’s not get blood on the books,” Lex cautioned, rising to their feet as well.
Tamsin’s smile widened a little. “Okay, champ,” she said, lip curling with a hint of sneer. “Careful you don’t wet yourself.” Then she turned with a ripple of hair and walked off.
I stood there for a while, shaking with rage and embarrassment until I managed to bring myself under control. When I turned to Lex, they were watching me with an unexpected mixture of concern and sympathy.
“This isn’t about getting a corner office,” I told them, a little hoarsely. “This isn’t even about saving the world. It’s about getting to the top, and kicking people in the teeth on my way up.”
“People like her?”
I nodded mutely.
After a moment, Lex nodded as well. “That’s the kind of ambition I can get behind. Okay. I’m in.”
There wasn’t much to say after that. Lex promised to keepresearching, which was nice of them, and we exchanged numbers before I returned to the thirteenth floor. For the rest of the afternoon, I seethed at the thought of Tamsin and Sunil snatching those positions in middle management away from me. I couldn’t let that happen.
It wasmyturn to win, and if either of them got in my way, I’d make them regret it.
