Page 78 of Once Upon a Holidate
“It’s not over. I have a second chance.”
“Yes, you do.”
He flung himself at her, holding her tight. “I’m sorry, Mom. I won’t ever screw up again, I swear.”
She chuckled as she hugged him back. “If only that were true.”
***
Joylyn stared at her phone as it rang. The picture and accompanyingMommade it clear who was calling. She’d spent the past week or so only dealing with her mother by text, where it was easy to pretend everything was all right. A phone call was different.
She debated not picking up but knew that was an immature response to what was going on, so told herself to suck it up before pushing the speaker button.
“Hey, Mom.”
“Hi, sweetie. How are you doing?”
A simple enough question, Joylyn thought. And yet she wasn’t sure how to answer.
“I’m good. Dad and I went to the first birthing class last night.”
“Your father went with you?”
“Someone had to. I can’t go alone—I need a partner.” Something her mother should know.
On the heels of that thought came an uncomfortable combination of resentment and hurt. After all, her mother had beenthe one to kick her out of her own home and force her to go live with her dad. Something Joylyn had resented. Only now that she was here, she found herself enjoying her time with her father more than she would have thought.
“Did it go all right?” her mother asked.
“Yes. Dad’s pretty freaked about it, but I’m happy to have the information.”
“So things are good between the two of you?”
There was a tentative quality to the question, as if her mother wasn’t sure she wanted the answer.
“They’re better now.” Joylyn put down the paper snowman she’d been assembling. “Mom, why did you let me not see Dad when I was a teenager? Why didn’t you force me to go with him on the weekends? I was a kid. I shouldn’t have been making that kind of decision myself.”
“You were determined not to see him anymore. You said you’d run away if I made you.”
“And you believed me?”
“I don’t know. Maybe I should have pushed the issue. There was a lot going on in my life, Joylyn. You were a moody teenager, and I had three boys under the age of ten. As you’ll find out when you have children of your own, knowing the right thing to do isn’t exactly intuitive, okay?”
“You sound really defensive.”
“I feel defensive. All you do is complain. It’s not pleasant.”
Joylyn stared at the phone in surprise. “I’m not complaining. I’m asking why you let me stop seeing my father when I was fifteen years old. The parenting plan gave him every other weekend. But you didn’t enforce that.”
Her mom was quiet for nearly a minute. “I don’t know why. It was easier to give in and not fight you on that. Maybe a part of me was jealous that you always had such a good relationship with your father when all you and I did was fight.”
Joylyn felt her mouth drop open. “Why would you be jealous? You’re my mom.”
“I know, but I had the day-to-day slog, and then you’d go off and have fabulous weekends with him. When you got home, you couldn’t stop talking about how great a time you had. You always had secrets with him and things you did together.” Her mother sighed. “I’m sorry. That’s on me, not on you. There’s no one reason I didn’t push you to be with him. I guess I should have tried harder to make you. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” she said softly. “I did what I did because Sandy said he’d dumped her because he didn’t care about her and I was next. I got scared that she was telling the truth, so I stopped seeing him before he could tell me he didn’t want to spend time with me anymore.”
“What? No! That bitch. I never liked her. What a horrible thing to say. You know it’s not true, don’t you? Honey, your dad adores you. He always has. If anything, I’m sure Sandy was jealous because you were so important to him.”
