Page 55 of Once Upon a Holidate
Wynn had a feeling the question was a lot more about feeling lonely than any serious introspection.
“Are you sorry you married Chandler?”
“What? No! Of course not. I love him. I’m not sorry we’re married.” She put a hand on her belly. “I wish I hadn’t gotten pregnant when I did, but we were always going to have kids. It’s just everyone’s having fun but me.”
“You do have more responsibility than your friends. Butyou’re also more settled. While they’re still trying to figure out their lives, you know where you’re going.”
“You’re right.” Joylyn sipped her lemonade. “I wouldn’t want to be dating. I’m glad I found Chandler when I did. We’re right together. I guess I’m lonely.”
“That makes sense. Your husband is deployed, your friends are all somewhere else. You have your dad, but no real girlfriend support system.”
Joylyn nodded glumly. “I should have stayed on base. If Chandler gets deployed again, I’m staying close to the other Marine wives.”
“So you have a plan.”
Joylyn looked at her. “How did you handle having Hunter on your own? I think about my son being born and it terrifies me. I have no idea what to do or how to take care of him. I mean I have younger brothers and I remember when they were babies, but that’s different. My mom was there. This time I’ll be the mom.”
“You do what you have to do. It is terrifying. The first fever, the first time he gets a cold. It’s a nightmare, but you learn and you get through it.”
“My mom was really young when I was born. Like seventeen. So was my dad. That’s four years younger than me. I mean they both had their parents, but still.” Joylyn paused. “My dad worked with the DEA.”
“On a joint task force.”
“You knew? Did everyone know but me?”
Wynn picked up her drink. “He told me a few weeks ago.”
“I just found out yesterday.” Her tone was bitter. “He just left me to be some hero.”
“I wasn’t there, but my understanding is that you refused to see him. He showed up every weekend for nearly two months,and every time you sent him away. Then he accepted the assignment. Or am I wrong?”
Joylyn shifted on her seat. “Okay, that’s how it happened, but it’s not how it felt.”
“How did it feel?”
“Like he didn’t care about me.”
“Have you told him that?”
“He wouldn’t get it if I tried.”
Wynn sensed that Joylyn was telling the truth—from her perspective, her father hadn’t cared. What she didn’t know was why Joylyn would go there. Garrick had shown up faithfully, begging his daughter to spend time with him. She’d been the one to refuse. So why would that leave her feeling rejected?
There was something she didn’t know, Wynn told herself. Some piece to the puzzle she couldn’t see.
“Did you and your dad have any Christmas traditions?” she asked.
Joylyn picked up her fork and took a bite of the coffee cake.
“Sure. Lots of them. We always had a tree—a real one. My mom insisted on an artificial one because she didn’t want to deal with the needles and stuff, but Dad got us a real one. He always insisted we get a tree from Wishing Tree, Washington, because he said those are the best. We had our own ornaments, and we always decorated it together.”
She smiled. “Every year I was into something different. One year the tree was all done in fairies and princess ornaments. It was so girlie—even the lights were pink—but he never complained. He always got me an Advent calendar. One year it was like a jewelry kit. I could make string bracelets and necklaces, adding beads every day.”
“That sounds like fun.”
“It was. He mentioned decorating yesterday, but we startedtalking about other stuff and it never happened. I miss how it used to be.”
“It’s not going to be exactly that, but you two could still have fun together.”
