Page 24 of Safe
“That’s great news.”
Alex sighed. I knew what that meant. Bad news. “Well, not so much. We just found that car on fire under an overpass on I-70.”
“Oh.”
“How’s Danielle?”
As soon as Alex asked that, I could feel my blood pressure shoot up, as if he might somehow read my mind and know what had happened in the hotel room—how it made me feel. My pulse quickened, and I was sure that if Danielle had looked over, she would have seen the beads of sweat forming on my forehead. Logically, I knew there was no way he could know, but guilt started eating away at me regardless.
“Hello?” Alex prompted on the line.
“Sorry, yeah. She’s fine. Do you want to talk to her?” I asked.
Before he could answer, Danielle cut in. “I don’t want to talk to him.” Her tone was fierce, final.
“It’s okay, Cody.” I could hear the hurt in Alex’s voice, but he didn’t sound surprised. “I figured she’d be mad at me for a while. Just let her know I love her, alright? I’ll let you go. Just call when you get there.”
“Will do. See you.” I hung up the phone and glanced over at Danielle.
She must have sensed I was going to say something, because a second later she looked over at me.
“What?” she asked, like she expected to be scolded.
“You shouldn’t be mad at Alex. He cares about you. He told me to tell you he loves you.”
“I know,” her reply was timid as she turned her attention to the window. “I just don’t want to talk to him right now.”
She let her head rest against the passenger window, and before long, she’d drifted off to sleep.
11. DANIELLE
I couldn’t find any words of comfort after Cody explained his reasons for helping Alex look out for me. Even though I hated to admit it, his confession began to shift how I saw him, despite my lingering unease about the whole situation. Part of me felt sorry for him, while another part realized he understood me more than I had once believed. I just lay there in silence, drifting in and out of sleep as he continued massaging the ache in my leg.
Once I was almost asleep for good, I noticed Cody pause, his touch leaving my leg. In an instant, the sense of safety and comfort I’d felt for the first time in years was gone. Instinctively, I reached for his hand and placed it back. Before I gave in to sleep, I managed to mumble the only response I could find.
“I’m sorry.”
That night, I slept better than I had in years. My sleep was uninterrupted and peaceful; a far cry from restless nights spent anxious and afraid. Just the simple act of a hand resting on me, a body lying next to me as I fell asleep, the body of someone who expected nothing from me and would do anything for me, made me realize what it was like to feel safe around a man. And so, I slept.
I was awoken by the sound of people talking in the hallway. I opened my eyes, blinking against the glare seeping through the curtains, adjusting to the light. To my surprise, I found Cody still in my bed, asleep, slouched over with his head resting on my leg. I was stunned. No wonder I had felt safe enough to sleep so deeply; I had assumed he would leave after I drifted off, but he had stayed with me all night.
The next few minutes, I just lay there watching his chest rise and fall with each long, slow breath. The dim light was just enough to highlight every vein and every curve of every muscle in his arm. It was the first time I reallylookedat Cody, but I stopped when I realized I was staring at the imprint of the muscles under his tank top. I felt my face get flushed, though I wasn’t sure why, considering he couldn’t see me taking in the sight of him. Wanting to let him rest, I shifted as best I could without interrupting him, sat up, and turned on the TV, lowering the volume so I wouldn’t disturb him.
When Cody finally woke up, he seemed to be in an irritating hurry, which quickly negated whatever sympathy I’d felt for him the night before. All I wanted was a shower and a decent breakfast before I had to force myself back into the car. After a bit of back-and-forth and rearing my attitude, he reluctantly agreed to let me get ready.
Just as I was about to get up and head for the bathroom, Cody asked me if I could manage it on my own, and I could already feel the dull burn of anxiety in my chest.
Fuck!
I hadn’t thought of that, and it was obvious Alex hadn’t either, because if he had, this would not have been the scenario I was now trapped in. The last thing I needed was Alex’s lonely, maybe even perverted, friend helping me wash my naked body.
“I’ll tell you what,” Cody started to say.
Oh great, here it comes.
I was just waiting for some gross proposition disguised as help. “I’ll help you to the bathroom door and then wait outside, just to make sure you’re okay. I want you to feel comfortable and safe. Nothing more, I promise.”
Oh. Maybe I was wrong about him.
