Page 22 of Safe
“Do you want the truth?” I asked.
She nodded, her focus finally turning away from the TV and settling on me, with a little too scowl for my nerves, but I was in no position to complain.
I took a breath.
“I offered because I felt like I didn’t have any real meaning in my life anymore. My parents died when I was really young. I barely remember them. I grew up in foster care, just drifting from one place to another. When I was sixteen, I met my first girlfriend, Riley. She was the first person who made any effort to care about me. She believed I could be more than what I thought I was. That’s why I joined the military. I wanted to give her a better life.”
By now, I was rambling, afraid I was losing her attention, but Danielle had shifted her body away from the TV. She was watching me with intent eyes, but her expression was softer now. Maybe it was working; maybe she understood me better now. I realized I’d left my story hanging, and Danielle gave me a look like she was pushing for me to go on.
“With the money I was supposed to make on my first deployment, I planned to buy her an engagement ring and get us a house. Three weeks after I shipped out, I got a letter from Riley’s mom. Riley had started working as a bartender to save some money, just until I came back. One night, driving home from work, she was hit by a drunk driver. She died instantly. The only person I ever cared about was gone, and it was all because I was out there trying to give her the life she deserved. If it hadn’t been for Alex, I never would have survived it. So, when I saw him almost lose the only person he cared about, I promised I would do whatever it took to keep that from happening. I guess in some weird way, I just wanted to feel my stars align again. I don’t even know if that makes sense, but…”
Danielle was silent, and for a moment, I was grateful. I wasn’t sure I could meet her eyes without falling apart. The only thing holding me together was the gentle, steady motion of massaging her leg, which I was intensely focused on. But now, the feelings I had were replaced with this empty void of vulnerability that was increasingly exacerbated by the silence.
Before I realized it, Danielle started to doze off. I paused, ready to slip away and let her sleep. Before I could leave, her hand drifted down, catching mine and guiding it, slow and careful, back onto her thigh. A shock pulsed through me. It was the first time Danielle wanted me near her.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered just as she drifted into sleep.
So I stayed, sitting by her side all night, keeping watch over her.
I woke up slouched over on the edge of Danielle’s bed. She was already awake, sitting up and watching TV. Her bright red bed head was easily the cutest thing I’d seen in a long time. Even just out of bed, she managed to look stunning.
Focus. Don’t go there.
“We should get moving soon. Let’s head to the trailer and get settled,” I said, groaning a little as I stretched and tried to work out the kinks in my back from the awkward way I’d slept.
“Good morning to you, too,” she replied in her usual dry tone. “Can I at least have breakfast and a shower first?”
“Of course,” I said, but then hesitated as a sinking feeling made a new home right in the pit of my stomach. “Um, Danielle? You can manage the shower on your own, right?”
She paused before giving me a look that suggested the thought hadn’t fully occurred to her either. A faint blush colored her cheeks as she looked down, twirling a strand of hair around her finger. Her fidgeting got worse as she worked out the logistics in her head, and I knew she was going to say yes, whether it was the truth or not. We had just gotten over the massaging hurdle; bathing was out of the question.
“I think so. I mean, I had a nurse helping me in the hospital, but…maybe you can just sit in the bathroom, just in case? Make sure I don’t fall,” she suggested, barely audible as if I wouldn’t agree. I could tell she wasn’t thrilled by the idea, but we both knew it was safer than risking a fall.
“I’ll tell you what,” I said, “I’ll help you get to the bathroom door and wait right outside. That way, I can hear if you need anything, and you’ll have your privacy. I just want you to be comfortable and safe, nothing more.”
She gave me a nervous little smile, and I had the sense my answer reassured her, if only a bit. We were making progress from the flat-out refusals from yesterday.
“Thanks, Cody.”
She began undoing the brace on her leg while I retrieved her cane from the dresser. I handed it over and offered my hand. Her hand rested lightly in mine as I walked beside her, adjusting my pace to match hers as we turned toward the bathroom.
“You’re getting pretty good at walking,” I said, hoping to give her a little confidence boost.
“It actually feels better this morning, probably because of that massage you gave me last night.”
“I’m glad it helped,” I replied, releasing her hand as we reached the door. “Take your time, go as slow as you need. I’ll be right here if you need anything.”
She nodded, gathering herself, and I settled in to wait just outside, ready if she called out.
As soon as she stepped inside and turned on the light, I let the door fall shut with a soft click and sat down on the floor, leaning back against the wood.
Danielle seemed like a different person this morning. She was gracious, even a little vulnerable. The defensive, closed-off attitude she’d had just yesterday was gone. I wondered if what I’d told her about Riley had shifted her perspective. Maybe she finally understood that I was in this for both of us, not just playing babysitter. Or maybe she just felt sorry for me.
I pulled out the phone Alex had given us and sent him a quick text.
Danielle is getting ready, then we are driving the other half of the trip. I’ll text you when we are at the apartment. Any sign of Landon?
It wasn’t long before I got a response.
