Page 37 of Butterflies and Hazel Eyes
“He knows what’s coming. I got his favorite ones too. He loves the snap when he bites into them.”
“I’m personally rather excited about the snap myself,” Gulliver agreed, carefully transferring the hot dogs into buns and snapping into the first one. My dog glared at him as if to say he should have had the first one of the night.
I laughed and tossed one into his bowl while I blew on the other one. Mojo inhaled the first one and licked his chops until I put the second one down. He ate that one slower while I loaded up the stick again.
Gulliver handed me his second dog. “Relax. Enjoy this one before you make more. You must be starving. Not only are you a kayaking rock star, but you made this most epic fire in a matter of minutes.”
I smiled as I chewed, the hot, juicy meat making my eyes roll around in my head. “I don’t know about a kayaking rock star. You did all the paddling while I gazed slack-jawed at the caves.”
He winked and held more dogs out over the fire. “Maybe, but you didn’t tip the boat, so that makes you a rock star.”
“I was too frozen in place by the sight before me, Gulliver. I’d never done anything as exciting as kayaking through caves before. It was beyond cool. Sliding through some crevices barely big enough for us was scary for someone my size. The reward of a new, bigger cave to explore was a blast, though. It was an afternoon to remember for the rest of my life. Thank you for doing it in a way I could get the most enjoyment from it.”
He squeezed my shoulder in encouragement. “I didn’t want to wait too long to show them to you. I was afraid you might decide to take off, and we’d never get to experience the caves together.”
I grasped his hand on my shoulder and held it tightly. “To be honest, this morning I was thinking since the website was done it might be time to head out, but I don’t know if I’m ready yet. I’m torn.”
“I guess I can understand that,” he said with a nod of his head. “I’m just worried you’re going to leave without any warning, and I won’t be ready for it. I don’t want to go back to the life I had before you arrived, Charity.”
“I can’t make any promises, Gulliver, but I would never leave without saying goodbye. I promise you that right now, okay?” He didn’t respond and kept his gaze focused on the flames, so I decided a subject change was in order. “Do you have any idea who’s behind the break-in? There has to be someone who has shown enough interest in what you’re doing to heighten your suspicions.” I lowered the hot dog fork to the ground and leaned back in my chair.
“The list is endless, Charity,” he said on a sardonic laugh. “There are several different groups that want a successful pesticide for large operations for different reasons, but for those watching my research closely, it’s for one reason.”
“Money,” I answered immediately.
“Everything in life is controlled by money. Mathias is doing some digging, and he might hire a private investigator if he can find a promising avenue to direct them down. I don’t have time to deal with it, nor do I have the means or ability. Mathias does.”
“Is it safe for you to be living at Butterfly Junction in the meantime, though?” I asked. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“I’m safe. No one can pick the lock on my door or unlock a window from the outside. They would have to break one, which would set off the alarm. Sure, they could try to smoke me out, but I have an emergency exit to the outside, and the fire system immediately calls the police and fire station if it goes off.”
“You’re telling me to stop worrying?” I asked, half-joking.
Our chairs were next to each other, and he slipped his hand into mine. “I like how you worry about me, but I don’t want it to consume you. I’m safe, I promise.” He patted my hand between his. “I hope you don’t think I hold your hand too much,” he whispered. “I always want to hold your hand when we’re walking, but I can’t, so I have to take the opportunity where I can.”
I let him twine his fingers in mine the way two couples do when walking together without a care in the world. “I’m glad you do, Gulliver. My heart aches that you feel like you have to explain yourself. You don’t. There is nothing typical about the two of us, both together and apart. All I know is the lack of human companionship over the last six years has been hard on me. I didn’t realize how much until you started holding my hand.”
“You didn’t date at all?” he asked, his voice incredulous.
“How could I? I was rarely in one place for longer than a week. Occasionally, I would go out with a group of people from one of the places I was working, but never anything serious. In hindsight, I realize I was too busy creating the childhood I’d never had, so being an adult fell by the wayside. It sounds weird, but I think you understand.”
He brushed his lips across my knuckles in affirmation of my words. “I do. You didn’t have time to date because you were busy living. I understand how important living and exploring is, but like you, I miss the companionship. I understood I’d always go it alone in this world, considering everything I went through as a kid. Then you appeared and showed me maybe I’m not as alone as I had always believed.”
I was moving before I made the mental decision to do so. I straddled his thighs and cupped his face. “Listen to me right now, Gulliver Winsome, you are not alone. Do you hear me?” I asked, my tiny fingers squeezing his cheeks until he grimaced.
He grasped my hands and held them loosely to his cheeks. “I hear you,” he promised. “But I also see you.”
I tipped my head, puzzled by his words. “You see me?”
His hands trailed down my waist to my thighs, leaving pinpricks of electricity on my skin. “You don’t just talk the talk, but you keep showing up and engaging with me in a genuine, caring way. Other women have claimed not to care about my leg issues, but in the end, they never lasted more than a couple of nice dinners out. They worried too much about the things I couldn’t do. You don’t believe there’s anything I can’t do.”
I rubbed at the frown lines between his eyes. “Because there’s nothing you can’t do!” I exclaimed in a hushed tone. I was never more grateful my campsite was at the back of the campground, away from prying eyes.
“There’s plenty I can’t do, Charity, at least not the same way most guys do them. I can’t take a shower without a bench to sit on. I can’t ride a bike, run, or do most physical things other guys strut around bragging about.”
“Those are little things, Gulliver. And you can ride a bike—they make handcycles—running is overrated, and I hate macho guys who strut around like they’re the best thing since sliced bread. Spoiler alert, they never are. They’re usually shallow jerks who forget that beauty doesn’t last, but brains do. I guess what I’m saying is, I prefer to focus on things we can do together rather than what we can’t. It’s ridiculous to think we have to be exactly alike to enjoy spending time with each other. You can’t type the beginning of a line of code, and I can’t pick out a dung beetle from any other beetle. Life isn’t a competition. It’s a journey.”
He smiled, his hands back to caressing my waist. “I’m smiling because you’re right, but also because most people don’t use logic to realize we’re not in a competition. Humans write people off and never give it a second thought, when the reality is, they might have just written off the one person they were meant to be with.”
