Page 54 of Hiding Rose
“You didn’t say anything wrong,” I said, my lip trembling slightly. “You’ve validated my feelings in a way you may never understand. When I think about him, I call him Gabriel in my mind.”
“Like the angel,” he said and I nodded.
“Gabriel was the angel who told of Jesus’s birth. He also presides over heaven as the angel of joy, life, truth, and dreams.” I put my hand on the angel pendant again. “It’s why I keep this so close to me and never take it off. It’s my Gabriel in physical form.”
He gathered me close to him and kissed me, my tears salty against our lips. He accepted them as part of the healing process and didn’t wipe them away, but let them become part of both of us. “From now on, we’ll refer to him as Gabriel. It’s the perfect name for your angel.”
I slid my arms around his neck and hugged him. “I love you and the way you love me. Most men wouldn’t worry about my feelings for a child created with a madman.”
He kissed my neck, nuzzling the spot with his nose for a moment. “I love hearing you say you love me. My heart squeezes and tears spring to my eyes every time. I love you more than my own life, Rose. It might be hard for some people to believe when we haven’t known each other for long, but I feel like our souls have been connected forever. All we had to do was follow our own lines until we met in the middle. Your feelings will always be the most important thing to me, and acknowledging your child, and I mean,yourchild, isn’t difficult for me to do. I want you to be happy, and I want Gabriel to be part of our lives. I would never disrespect you by pretending he didn’t exist, however brief his time with you was.”
I rested my tired head on his shoulder. “I always dreamed of finding a guy who loved me the same way Gideon loves Kate, and now I have.”
He pulled me onto his lap and relaxed back into the lounger, my whole torso on his chest to rest. “The way Gideon loves Kate?”
I nodded. “He would die for her, Sawyer. Of that, I have no doubt. Since the day he showed up in Snowberry he was a goner. He knew he screwed up in Hawaii the first time they met, and he also understood on a soul deep level this was God giving him a second chance with the woman he was supposed to be with. He knew he better not screw it up again. There’s something special about them, even when they were yelling their fool heads off at each other in Kate’s office the first day he showed up in Snowberry. I could hear them all the way out in the main reception area. Then in an instant, it went dead silent.”
“They called a truce?” he asked, stroking my hair.
I chuckled. “No, Gideon grabbed Kate and hushed her with his lips, and his tongue. She said it was the hottest and most profound kiss she’s ever had, even if he made her madder than a wet hen.”
His lips sought mine and the ocean sounds surrounded us as we kissed. His tongue found mine and his lap grew hard the longer it lasted. He tore his lips from mine and panted, shifting around under me to rub himself against me and ease his pain.
“Have I ever kissed you the way she described Gideon’s?” he asked, his thumb rubbing across my face in a rhythm.
I nodded slowly. “The night in my apartment when you brought me champagne and told me I was beautiful. When you kissed me, you didn’t take more than I offered, and you respected my feelings. Those were the things you did to solidify you in my heart; respect and understanding. One kiss changed my whole outlook on my future. I suddenly understood I might still be worthy of love and companionship.”
He put my hand over his board shorts. “Oh, there’s no might about it, sweetheart. Do you feel what you do to me every time we kiss? No matter how hard I try, my body rejects my determination to play it cool. Are you worthy of love and companionship? More than I am, which is for damn sure. You deserve nothing but happiness now, and I want to be the man to give it to you.” I rubbed him through the slick material, my eyes closed as I felt his moan under my cheek. It growled through his chest and it made me slick with want. “I wish I could make love to you right now,” he whispered. “I would show you how a man who would do anything for a woman makes her feel.”
“We’re alone here and Niko is driving the boat,” I whispered.
He groaned long and low as if he was relieving himself of the torture in his lower half. “You’re naughty and going to get me in trouble. I also don’t have any condoms.”
I twisted around carefully, so I was straddling his lap. I kissed him, biting and sucking at his lips as he ground himself against me. “I told you last night you don’t need condoms. My own insecurities were rearing their ugly head. My reasoning was, if I made you wear a condom, even though you knew I was protected, it would make you think twice about wanting to be with me, and my little world would continue to spin on a single axis. Instead, you respected my feelings, bought condoms, and were prepared when the time came. You lifting the silver packet from between the towels was all it took for my heart to know you’d always protect it, and I could trust you.”
He kissed me, his fingers digging into my shoulders. “Always,” he whispered. “I’m always going to protect you, even if it costs me my own life.”
He slipped his hand inside the fly of his board shorts and released himself, his hardness yearning for my touch. His back to the stairs, I could watch for anyone approaching over his shoulder, but I wasn’t worried. We were alone. His fingers tugged at my bikini bottoms and he touched me, sucking in a breath when he encountered my intense desire for him.
“Let me do the work,” he whispered and then he guided me over him, settling me on his lap. I sighed, and the sound made him twitch inside me. My head over his shoulder, I rested on his chest as he held me against him, his hips barely moving, but still stoking the fire between us.
“Sawyer, I didn’t know it could be like this,” I moaned softly into his neck, the pressure building in my body.
“This is love,” he whispered as he kissed my neck, his hips massaging us to ecstasy. He moaned low and quietly, the sounds of our pleasure covered by the rumble of the boat’s motor. “You feel like heaven, Rose. I need to let go,” he cried into my neck. “Oh, God,” he growled and my own mind exploded. I rode the swing into the sky as he twitched and bucked inside me
I collapsed onto his chest, his hands already straightening my clothes in case we were interrupted by Niko. His hands rubbed my back as his breathing returned to normal. “I’m a goner, baby,” he said, his lips on my cheek. “I’m quickly becoming addicted to the way you make me feel. I realize after being with you, I’ve never made love before. I’ve had sex, but it was never as soul-fulfilling as being with you is. I could die right now and be a happy man having spent my last moments wrapped up in you.”
I lifted my head and kissed him languidly. “I’m beginning to understand what all the fuss is about. I always thought sex was a chore and never understood the allure of it, until now. Until you.”
He kissed my forehead, and shifted me around to lay next to him, so it didn’t look suspicious if Niko showed up. The water plowed under us as we rode toward home and I sighed. Once we arrived there our private, special time would be behind us and we’d be back to work and the reality of my injury. The massage therapist and orthotic provider had called me yesterday within an hour of leaving the clinic. We got an early start today and it was barely eight a.m. At ten I had an appointment to get the brace measured. They would work on making it and I would return to the resort for a massage. Gideon has a massage therapist on staff at the spa, but she declined the job since she isn’t trained in medical treatments. Instead, the therapist Dr. Keoki recommended would come to the resort for the massages. They don’t want me going offsite any more than I have to, they said.
I caressed his face with my hand. “Can I ask you something?”
He smiled down at me and winked. “Anything, sweetheart.”
I closed my eyes and swallowed, wondering if he knew how hard it was for me to ask this question. “Will you be able to come with me to my brace fitting and massage appointments or will you have to work? I was hoping you’d want to be part of the appointments and my treatments. I loved the way you supported and helped me yesterday and I would rather not do all of it alone anymore. If you learn the massage maybe you could be the one to continue the treatments when I’m done?”
His grip tightened on me and what I saw in his eyes told me I made the right decision asking him. “I thought you’d never ask, baby,” he whispered. “I want to be part of it with you and learn the techniques to make you feel better.”
