Page 23 of Trusting Trey
“I met someone a few months ago. She wears leg braces and has cerebral palsy. I picked up some books she had dropped on campus and when I looked up into her eyes, something clicked in my heart. I fell in love with her and nothing else mattered. We haven’t been apart since. I help her get to class with her books safely and she helps me with my history homework.”
We all sat quietly around the table as though we were unsure of what to say. Kristin spoke first. “I thought you liked guys. You were always off with one or another of them.”
For the first time since I’d known her, Daphne looked embarrassed. “I left New York and moved to Duluth, convincing myself I could be straight if I had different, more salt of the earth, type guys to choose from. I thought my dislike of men was because none of them were mature enough to keep me interested.”
“But that didn’t happen?” I asked and she shook her head, chuckling a little.
“No, instead I engaged in risky behavior to force myself to like men. Apparently, I’ve always been a lesbian.”
I couldn’t hold it in and laughed this time. “I’m sorry for laughing, but it’s true. Sometimes we try to be someone we aren’t because we think we won’t be accepted by others.”
She nodded and looked down at her hands on her lap. “That’s another big part of the puzzle. My parents will never accept that I’m gay. I came here and found such a supportive LGBTQ community on campus, I went and talked with two of the counselors. They told me what I already knew. I was denying who I was because I feared my family would disown me.”
“What are you going to do?” Kristin asked.
“I’m flying back to New York over Christmas break and I’m taking Angie. After the holidays, I’ll tell my parents I’m gay. If they can’t handle it, then they’ll have to accept that I won’t be in their life anymore. Denying who I am on the inside is eating me alive and I can’t do it anymore.”
I rubbed her shoulder and squeezed it for good measure. “You always have a home with us.MaandBabalove you and whom you chose to love won’t make a bit of difference to them.”
She nodded quickly and tried to smile, but I could tell that talking about losing her parents was killing her on the inside. “Thanks, Allison. I appreciate your support and being cool with me and Angie.”
I smiled. “Of course I’m cool with it; you’re happy and that’s all that matters. Do you have a picture of her?”
She smiled shyly and pulled out her wallet, taking out a snapshot of her and Angie at a football game. It was dark and the field lights shone in the background as someone snapped a picture of them hugging each other under a blanket. “She’s gorgeous, Daphne,” I said, handing the picture to one of the girls around the table. “I’ve never seen you smile that big,” I added, teasing her a little bit.
“I know this girl,” Liz said suddenly as she took the image. “She saved my butt in chemistry last year. She’s brilliant. I wouldn’t be surprised if she becomes a doctor.”
Daphne grinned wide. “She’s going into research. She wants to find better treatment for people with neuromuscular diseases.” It was then, what she said hit her, and she put her head in her hand. “I’m sorry, Allison. I forgot.”
I rubbed her back for a second. “Don’t apologize, Daph. Besides, I have a traumatic spinal cord injury, not a neuromuscular disease. The difference is the damage to my cord can’t be treated the way a disease can. Neuromuscular diseases are just that, diseases, and with the proper therapies they can be cured or, at the very least, improve with medication and surgical treatments. I think it’s great that she’s going into research. We certainly need more researchers in that area and it sounds like she’s the woman to do it.”
Liz handed Daphne her picture back and pushed herself up from the table. “This has been fun, but I have to go to work,” she said, coming over and hugging me around the shoulders. “Let’s do this again after Christmas break, okay?”
We all agreed we would and the other girls followed Liz from the restaurant while I signed the bill.Babarefuses to let me pay when we eat here, but I always sign the slip so he knows I had been here. He would be in later tonight for the dinner rush, but during the afternoon, my parents were working on emptying their house of anything they didn’t absolutely need, and getting ready to sell it after the holidays. They bought a new home that is accessible for me when I want to visit, but now they have to sell theirs. They aren’t getting any younger either, and mymahas issues with her knees. My accident just hastened the decision they would have eventually made.
Daphne pushed my wheelchair to the front doors of the restaurant and locked the wheels. “Did you text Trey?” she asked and I nodded.
“He’s on his way,” I assured her.
“Okay, I’m going to go to the restroom and then I’ll wait with you until he gets here. Do you have to go?” she asked and I shook my head.
She headed down the hallway that led to the restrooms while I sat in my wheelchair, my back aching from the hours we had been at the restaurant. Even with the pain, it felt good to socialize and feel normal again for the first time in a long time. I heard two men talking and turned to see one of the waiters tying on his apron while he talked with the maître d'. I zeroed in on his voice, and then his face, the eyes sparking a memory that turned my stomach. I unlocked the chair and wheeled quickly towardBaba’soffice, wanting as much distance between us as possible.
I barely made it inside the door and my stomach rolled, the lunch I had just eaten forcefully ejected from my mouth into the garbage can. I heaved several more times, as the memories of that night poured through my mind like a pitcher of evil. The horror and pain of what happened left my soul raw and my stomach on fire. I leaned forward to vomit again, losing control of my body and falling from my wheelchair to the floor. I lay there, covered in my own vomit and wanting to hug my knees, but they wouldn’t follow my commands. He was the reason my body defied me. He was the reason my back hurt the way it did, he was the reason I will never have a normal life like all my friends. He was the reason for all of it and I could hardly breathe under the weight of knowing what I had gone through in that basement.
"Allison?"
I could hear Daphne calling for me from down the hall. I couldn't get back in my chair and I couldn’t yell for help. He might come in here and touch me again, or worse, try to finish the job and kill me.
"Allison!" Daphne said kneeling by me. "Don’t move. I'm going to call an ambulance!"
I grabbed her arm to stop her and moaned. "No, I'm okay."
She held my head off the floor with her hand under my cheek and shook her head a little. "I can't get you back in your chair. At least let me get someone to help me."
"No!" I cried. "I don't want him to see me," I whispered, the panic beginning to swell inside me. “He’s out there, Daphne, you have to protect me.”
"Allie!" Trey called and Daphne ran to the office door.
