Page 186 of Swords of Soul and Shadow
I lay awake at night wishing I could see the moons and stars. Not because I want to comment on their beauty or how it still amazes me that our ancestors sped through them to find this planet. No, I want to see them because I know wherever you are, you’re looking up at the same moons, the same stars, the same beautiful sky. And if I think of that, I don’t feel so alone.
The corner of her eyes stung; out of love or sorrow, she wasn’t sure which. Both, probably.
Because the reality was, hewouldbe alone at the end of this. They would no longer be able to look up at the same sky.
All the love and warmth and glee over the words he’d written crashed into an ice-cold abyss inside her. No matter which decision she made, it would take her away from him.
“Let me grab my jacket, will you?” Kase’s voice called from outside the tent.
Hallie sprang up, the journal falling to the floor. The tent flap opened as Hallie retrieved the book.
Kase froze in the entrance. “What’re you doing?”
“Nothing.” Hallie whipped the book behind her back.
He raised a brow, his mouth pulling up into a smirk. The scar on that side of his face creased a little with the movement. “Is that so? Because if I didn’t know any better, I might say you were hiding something from me.”
Hallie shook her head. “Nothing.”
Well, she was hiding a lot of things, but nothing she wanted to discuss at that precise moment. He stepped fully intothe tent, the canvas closing behind him. Stars, he was so tall. He must’ve recently finished a patrol on the hover, because his goggles were pushed into his hair—or maybe not, as he’d left his jacket here. Or maybe he was on his way there? Hallie cursed herself for not waiting outside for him to return. Her thoughts were all jumbled.
“Well, if I were a betting man, I’d say you’ve been reading that little book,” Kase stepped close to her. “Shouldn’t be surprised, bibliophile that you are.”
Hallie backed up, but she stumbled at the edge of the cot. She would’ve fallen and probably hurt herself if Kase hadn’t caught her around the waist and pulled her to him.
He used the opportunity to pluck the journal from her fingers. Without loosening his hold on her, he held it up with his free hand. “You weren’t supposed to ever read these, you know.”
Hallie’s face burned, and she blurted, “I thought it might’ve been a novel or something and I was just waiting for you to come back and I’m sorry that I read them but I didn’t read them all—well maybe most of them but I—"
He tossed the journal next to the balled-up blanket and bent his head down, his lips hovering just above hers. She trailed off. He chuckled, “Did your mother never teach you manners, Miss Walker?”
Hallie held her breath.
The tent flap opened again. “Hurry it up, will you? Father’s waiting.”
Kase didn’t even look, only tugged off his goggles and chucked them at the entrance. “Go away.”
Hallie jumped, and Kase tightened his hold on her. Her face burned even more than it had moments ago when she’d blundered through her explanation of reading his journal. Kase turned a little to look at his brother. She half hid in Kase’s arms,but she could still see Jove Shackley standing in the entrance, his arm propping the flap open.
He wore a smirk of his own—one so like Kase’s it was uncanny. Jove held up Kase’s goggles. “Probably shouldn’t snog when you’re needed at the command tent, but if you ask nicely, I could probably buy you five minutes.” He tossed the goggles back. “But I’ll call in a favor at a later date, of course.”
Kase caught his goggles and tossed them on top of the journal. Hallie wanted to sink into the floor.
“Deal,” Kase said, turning away from him. A grin split his face as Jove left. He touched his forehead to hers. Her stomach clenched, and her mind went completely blank. He slowly and deliberately brushed his nose against hers. “We can probably get away with ten minutes alone, depending on the excuse he comes up with. He’s an overachiever.”
Alone.
Alone…alone…
…And if I think of that, I don’t feel so alone.
The letter. That line.
Kase had his brother. He had his mother. He had Clara and Samuel. He even had her father, maybe her mother. He would never bealoneagain.
But if she reset time, he just might be.
That was a sobering thought.
