Page 39 of Brandishing Balance
Marcos had offered to stay at the house a while longer since apparently, he’d already been doing that to take care of Luke. Elaine was being a finicky fucking bitch, and said she was tired of all the company. She wanted her peace and quiet back.
I was just supposed to find new accommodations after being released from the hospital? It was fucking bullshit. Elaine was kicking me out all over again.
So fucking Nico had swooped in and saved the day and offered up his place, saying Luke and I could stay with him. I was still in disbelief that my mother had refused to let me come home, and had agreed like an idiot instead of arguing with her.
“This is ridiculous. I don’t know why she’s such a fucking bitch all the time,” I muttered to my sister while she helped me pull my clothes on for the first time. It hurt to move my arms with broken ribs, and Jenna had been a life saver, grabbing me a button-up shirt to wear.
Jenna sighed. “I don’t know, Maya. I think the separation might be good for both of you. You’ve been through a lot, and I’m not sure that house is the best place for you right now.”
I frowned. “Why wouldn’t the house be a good place for me?”
“I just mean, being around her in general. You need to heal in a safe environment, and while the house is fine, we both know mom can be ridiculous and not realize how cruel she’s being,” Jenna said, holding up a sleeve to a sweatshirt for me to slip my arm into.
I moved slowly, sliding my arm through the sleeve. Mourningside felt the approach of autumn as September brought a cold front and the reminder that winter was making its approach quickly.
“What makes you think being with Marcos, Jason, and Nico will be good for me?” I countered.
“I think we both know that Nico will move heaven and earth for you. And the other two…I say give them a chance. They’veboth realized just how fucked up the situation is. They’re trying. They want to make amends. It’s clear they still love you.”
I frowned, watching as my sister moved about the room, picking things up and gathering the last of my belongings. Nico had already grabbed most of my things that morning, taking them back to his place, but there were still odds and ends left behind.
Where the fuck were they? After a sold week of all of them—Nico especially—breathing down my neck and hovering nearby, they were gone. Only Nico had come back to the hospital the night before, after I had kicked the three of them out for annoying the shit out of me.
Nico didn’t offer an explanation, and I didn’t ask.
Marcos and Jason hadn’t been by this morning, and Nico had taken off right after having breakfast with me. He said he had some stuff to do to get ready for my arrival, but he would be back in time to drive me home.
“How am I supposed to make amends with men that see me as fragile and breakable? Like, what the fuck Jenna? Do we just go back to how we were? I can’t do that. I’m not that same person anymore! I’ve been through too much—seen too much. It’s not possible.” I felt like I was ranting and took a deep breath, shaking my head.
“You don’t, sweetheart. You fucking don’t. You have to have the hard conversations. You need to break down what happened after you left them, and how you felt about that last scene. Most of all, you need to fucking talk to them abouteverything,” Jenna stressed.
I looked away, feeling disheartened. “I’m not sure I can,” I admitted.
Jenna sighed and sat beside me on the hospital bed. Reaching for my hand, she squeezed my fingers gently. “Have you called your therapist yet?”
I shook my head.
“What about your friends at Niche?”
My brows furrowed at the thought of the BDSM club I used to frequent. The friends I had made there had been a lifesaver when I had hit rock bottom after leaving Mourningside/Creekton all those years ago. The friendships I had, had opened my eyes to things in my relationship with the guys that wasn’t all right.
I hadn’t talked to any of those friends since I moved back down here, not truly. We kept up through text messages in group chats, but nothing substantial. The thought of talking to them anytime soon and having to explain what happened only made my anxiety skyrocket. So I shook my head, shaking the thought away.
I refused to think about it right now.
There was a knock on the door, and I looked over to see Nico standing there, his blond hair around his shoulders and bright blue eyes sparking as he grinned. “Hey, Little Dreamer. You ready to break out this joint?”
I couldn’t keep the smile off my face if I tried. Nico was a goofball, but he was my goofball. “Yeah. Let’s blow this popsicle stand.”
“Right on!” Nico said.
Darla walked in with a wheelchair a moment later and I turned to Jenna. “Are you following us?”
“No, I’m gonna go check on mom. Then I’m probably going home tomorrow afternoon. I’ll come by in the morning before I leave to say goodbye.” Jenna squeezed my fingers again.
“What about Luke?” I turned to Nico.
“Already at my place with Marcos. We’ve got him covered, no worries.” Nico grinned.
