Page 14 of Patiently Yours
We sit on one of the loveseats to wait. You would never guess that a horde of men live in this house, much less that they had a raging party the night before. The place is spotless and there must be an assortment of scent neutralizers in the air because I feel oddly comfortable amongst the old books and their smell. I take in another whiff, letting the vintage ease into my body. It grounds me, making me feel calm but also courageous. There’s a hint of something else simmering in the air, too.Is someone making tea?
I smell him before I see him. A whine tries to come up my throat when the comfortable scent gets obscured up by the odor of murky waters. My stomach turns to knots.
It’s fear. He’s made you fear him,my omega reminds me. I don’t speak to her very often, but she’s strong in my chest right now. Eager.
“Stacia.” I turn to look at Derek. He’s got a splint covering his nose, and there’s little splotches of purple in the corners of his eyes.
I get a weird satisfaction at seeing that his night didn’t go nearly as well as he wanted me to believe.
“What happened?” I wince at my involuntary question, because I don’t actuallycarewhat happened, it just feels natural to say whatever I can to avoid conflict with him. I realize I’ve taught myself to say things I knew he would like throughout our relationship, like a “good omega.”
I realize there are some things I’ll need to work on now. Things that he changed in me that I didn’t notice before.
“I’ll tell you alone,” he responds while side-eyeing my best friend.
Rory just glares at him, her arms crossed. “Nice try, but I’m staying right here.”
Derek stands oddly still, returning Rory’s glare. It’s uncomfortable and silent for a minute before I huff and stand up.
“She’s not going anywhere. This won’t take long anyway.” I take another sniff of the air, trying to isolate the lovely book smell so I can muster up more courage. “Just tell me what happened so we can move on.”
He looks infuriated that I didn’t heed his command. He scrunches his nose and winces when it hurts him, his angry eyes meeting mine. “I got into it with that beta you were talking to. Then, his pack mate hit me.”
Ciro. The thought of the beautiful beta gives me butterflies. Then I feel sad. He must have been so confused. I feel bad thatI might have ruined his and his pack mates’ night because of Derek and I’s toxic mess of a relationship.
I don’t exactly know what to say. Derek’s scent continues to soil the lovely vintage smell in the room and makes me want to hurl. I should have known this wasn’t going to work from that fact alone. Scents are very important to omegas and I’ve been ignoring my distaste of his for so long.
I feel tongue-tied, but then my omega is helping me open my mouth and the words are out before I can question them.
“Derek, it’s over.”
There’s a sudden release of energy leaving my body, and then…relief. I also feel a bit sad—and fearful—but I mostly feel empowered for the first time in months.
That is, until I see the entitlement on Derek’s face.
“Sure. You’ve said that before,” he chuckles. He fuckingchuckles.I hear Rory give an omega growl from behind me. “We both know it’s not. So, how about we go get some lunch and talk this through?”
His nonchalance makes me pause. I didn’t expect this. I thought he’d throw a tantrum, not…dismissme. It should be firing me up, but instead, it causes me to feel… guilty?
“Stacia.” Rory’s voice reaches me in the fog. When I turn to look at her, she’s looking at me with expectant eyes. I hear her words again in my head.
Please let this be over.
I hold onto those words. My best friend believes in me. I have to start believing in myself again, too.
“No, Derek.” I turn back to him, his apathy withering at the expression on my face. “I mean it this time.”
“Stacia—” He starts to say, but I cut him off, steel in my words.
“Your number is blocked. You are not allowed to stop by. You’re not allowed to contact me. I don’t want to see you. Do you understand?”
My omega preens inside of me. How long has she been waiting for me to catch up, I wonder?
I suddenly feel ashamed. I wasn’t even paying attention to the deepest most innate part of myself.Where have I been?
“Stacia… let’s talk about this.” His surprised expression is bleeding with deception before he turns his attention to my best friend. “Can youpleaseleave the room?”
I hear her scoff. “And give you the opportunity to make her feel like this isn’t the best decision of her life?No thank you.”
