Page 1 of From My Past
Chapter One
Talia
Before…
I sat down on a gross, dirty, weathered lawn chair and wondered how the hell I got here.
There was throwback music playing, the kind that everyone knew every lyric to even if they didn’t want to. Bodies were grinding and thrusting against each other as the music blared and everyone was in their own world. Arguments were happening on either side of me, along with heated declarations of love - or lust - and cocky guys, bragging about this, that or the other thing.
I was able to break apart from the drinking games and find a moment for myself away from others while I tried to recharge my own social batteries. I’m already pretty tipsy, but the thing about me is that I might put on a tough, confident exterior, but inside I’m a ball of anxiety and want. Iwantto make everyone happy while still proving myself and succeeding as much as I can. Iwantto prove myself and show everyone that I’m a badass to my core.
That’s why I’m here. At a party that I wasn’t even formally invited to. I overheard some of the other guys in my class talking about how big of a ‘rager’ it was going to be. I figured that they wouldn’t notice one more girl sneaking in and after I heard them say the Sigma Epsilon Delta house, I decided to go. Worse case scenario; they tell me no at the door and I leave. Best case; I get some free booze and maybe I could make a friend that wasn’t nose deep into a textbook at all times like myself and everyone else I know.
“Talia! What are you doing here?” A singsong, twinkling voice called from behind me. I turned to see the beautiful Morgan Hull approaching. She was one of the most popular girls at Pryde with her lithe, toned body from hours of yoga and running, her sleek waves of fiery red hair and her pale blue eyes. I watched the guys around her as she walked up to me, out of five guys she passed four of them watched her walk, watching her short mini skirt barely keep her ass covered.
“Morgan!” I said with an equally high, fake on my end, voice. She came up and hugged me in an overly friendly way for someone who wasn’t a fan of me. It was a struggle to not roll my eyes at her. This girl had been the bane of my existence in high school and when I found out she had decided to come to Pryde, I was pissed.
“What are you doing here? I never thought I’d see you out of the computer lab. Thank god, Talia Jones finally decided to grace us with her presence.” She laughed at her sarcasm and took a swig from her own red cup. I didn’t even try to hide an eyeroll.
“I just needed a night out. Midterms were hard.”
“Oh, you poor thing. My midterms were a cake walk. Are you sure you’re studying enough?” Morgan had this unique way of speaking that was almost always an insult, but her tone was genuine. It was a talent. One that pisses me off to no end. Thank fuck I hadn’t seen her almost the entire time I’ve been here at Pryde. My buildings for classes were nowhere near hers were apparently.
“I’m doing just fine. Thanks.” I needed another drink quickly, but she had cornered me before I could find another one. If this bitch was going to continue to be such a cunt, I am going to need much more and much harder liquor.
“Oh, honey,” Said so condescendingly that it made me want to slap her. Morgan patted my dark hair. “You didn’t answer my question. What are you doing here?”
I moved out of her reach before she could touch me again. When I spoke, there was ice in my tone to match my poorly concealed anger. “I heard there was a party and people could come, so I came. What areyoudoing here?”
“I have a standing invitation here.” Morgan said confidently with a flick of her hair over her shoulder.
“Good for you.”
“You know, if you looked a bit more like you did in high school you could get the guys to pay a bit more attention to you.”
That was one of the reasons I changed my looks so much and finally let myself look on the outside like I felt on the inside. I look out into the sea of people to see just how different I am. Not only in looks, but personality as well. I don’t know what I was thinking trying to drink and party with these sorority girls who all look like copies of each other.
Once upon a time, I looked like them too. Long blonde hair, perfect “natural” makeup, flawless skin. Mine was natural and unintentional, borderline unwanted. Theirs is perfectly crafted and painted on.
Looking down at the empty red solo cup in my hand, I notice my chipped black nail polish and the carefully designed snake tattoo that spiraled up around my forearm, weaving in between flowers. I love this tattoo; I love the design, I love the meaning. It was the first one I ever got and it made me feel like I stood out. I was no longer the perfect barbie doll that everyone saw of me and made their assumptions. A snake in the roses. Maybe I should have put on the ‘perfect’ girl costume, just for the night to make it easier on myself. A short skirt that showed my long legs and a tight tank top that left nothing to the imagination. The hardest part would have been taking my eyebrow, nose and tongue piercings out and covering all the tattoos. But why would I have done that? Changed myself to fit into the masses after I had worked so hard to do the opposite.
“I’m good.”
“Your loss. But having one of these guys take you and fuck you senseless, ah, it’s so worth it.” Morgan shivered and said with a moan, like she was putting on a show for the guys standing around us to get their attention. Which of course, it worked when two tall guys wearing polos and khakis turned and looked her up and down.
“Again, I’m good.”
“What, are you a virgin?” Morgan said, slightly too loud for my liking.
“Fuck off, Morgan.” I turned on the heel of my biker boots and left her standing in the mass of admirers.
“Oh honey, don’t be scared! It’s okay if you’re a virgin, you don’t need to be embarrassed.”
Instead of looking back and going off on her, I just kept walking. She wasn’t worth it and I did not want to be around the group of people that had heard her. Why did I come here? I could have gotten drunk by myself and passed out happily in my own bed.
I knew why. The longing to let myself go, let all the worries and fears lose for just a few hours was much too tempting to pass up. I’ve been working on my midterm project in computer graphics. I’m only a sophomore at Pryde University in Boston, but I’m working to get my degree in engineering. That’s right, engineering.
I want to build engines and create technology to advance travel. I hope that one day, I’ll be designing the next airplane, taking passengers safely, faster and more luxuriously from one destination to another than is possible now. I may not look like it, but I’m a complete grease monkey. I love pulling apart things and figuring out what makes them tick. Watches, computers, engines, you name it.
