Page 54 of Deep Blue Lies
“And there’s no way you can ask her?
I shake my head. “We don’t speak about it. We never have. Whenever I’ve asked her about where I come from she…”
“She what?” Maria asks gently.
“I don’t know. She shuts me down. The most she’s ever done is make it a joke – but one she doesn’t want to tell. She said he was a waiter – like a total cliché, an embarrassing mistake. Like maybe that’s the reason she won’t say, or maybe she doesn’t even know his name. Or which one he is.” I think of the parade of men in the diary. “It’s hard to explain.”
“OK.” Maria looks like she understands, but she’s quiet for a long while.
“When we spoke in the shop, I told you about the tragedy at the Aegean Dream Resort, the deaths of the couple managing the resort, and how their infant daughter was left alive?”
“Yes.”
She purses her lips. “Alythos is not a big place…” She stares at the wall, and her words fade out. She turns to me, smiles.
“Ava, would I be correct in thinking you suspect a link between yourself and the child left alive that night?”
I don’t answer for a few moments. Finally though I shrug again.
“The dates seem to fit.”
It’s weird, hearing the idea in the open. I glanceat her, not quite looking. From the corner of my eyes, I almost hope she’s going to burst out laughing at the idea, but she doesn’t.
“Yes. They do. It does seem at least plausible, if not probable, that there’s a connection. And the baby listed in the records, born on that date?—”
“Why wouldn’t they tell us about that?” Sophia asks, “at the medical centre?”
“I don’t know.” Maria looks at her daughter. “My guess would be the records were sealed when the baby was adopted. In Greek law this is often done to protect the child whose parents die. So they can grow up without the burden of knowing a difficult truth.”
“But Ava already knows what happened, everyone does. The manager guy murdered his girlfriend then killed himself. So how does that protect her?”
“Well in this case it doesn’t.IfAva really is this baby.” She turns to me, but I hardly hear her. In my mind I’m there that night. An infant, lying where, in a crib? On the bed? While my dad beats my mother to death, and then kills himself. How long was I there, waiting to be found, their bodies growing cold beside me?WasI even there? Was it really me?
“There must be other records?” Sophia asks. “If Ava was that child she must be able to find out from somewhere. She has a right to know!”
Maria doesn’t answer at once. “I don’t know. I imagine so. I expect that, if you can prove you were the child, you might be granted access. But if you can’t prove it…if the only proof isinthe files…I imagine it might be difficult.” She looks at me heavily. “It could take a long time. It will certainly be expensive.”
“But that’s unfair? Surely she has a right to know who her parents really were?”
Maria doesn’t answer Sophia this time, but turns her eyes on me. I look down at the table.
“I’m not even sure I want to know. If my dad was a monster.”
Maria doesn’t say anything. Instead she gets up and begins to clear the rest of the plates. I go to help her, but she stops me,then lets me when she sees I need something to distract myself. We take a break while her and Sophia bring a dessert, something they callgalaktoboureko. When it arrives it’s a sort of creamy custard pie wrapped in layers of filo pastry. Maria cuts a generous slice and hands me a plate. I can smell the lemons and cinnamon.
“There is one way I may be able to help,” Maria says quietly.
I look up.
“Perhaps two.”
I wait, a forkful of the dessert quivering in front of me.
“The detective who led the investigation into the murders. He’s a man named Nikos Papadakis. He’s retired now, but back then he was the head of the island police. Before that…” – a quiet smile comes to her lips – “Along timebefore that – we were in school together.”
I stay quiet, unsure where this is going.
“I can’t say if he’ll actually remember what happened to the child. But it was a big case, and I’m sure he’ll know something. What’s less clear is whether he’ll speak to you. But I wonder if I come with you…” She looks thoughtful. “There might be something he could tell you?” She shrugs, like she barely believes in the idea herself.
