“Go about your day. If they’re watching you, watching us, don’t let them think they’ve rattled you.”
I wasn’t sure I had it in me. I didn’t have the acting and manipulation skills he had.
Climbing out of bed, I crossed the room, arms wrapped around my chest. I didn’t want him to see me fall apart. Not again. He’d seen enough cracks already, and if I broke now, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to gather the pieces back together. It created a vulnerability I didn’t want to display. “I need to shower.”
“Leave the door open, and I don’t mean that in a creepy way. I just want to be able to hear you if something happens.”
My brow lifted. “What exactly do you think will happen in the shower?”
“I don’t discount anything, little raven. Even something as trivial as a shower.”
“I’ll be like twenty steps away. I think I’ll be fine,” I said, moving to the dresser and opening a drawer to look for clean clothes. “We’re essentially in the same room. You don’t need to hover.”
His voice came from closer than I expected. I hadn’t heard him cross the room, but I couldn’t fault my distractedness. “And you’re not going to do anything reckless?” He didn’t want to leave me alone, but I needed the space. The tears I held back wouldn’t be suppressed for much longer.
“When have I ever?” I forced a small smile over my shoulder, trying to prove I was good.
He gave me that dry look, the one that said he saw right through my bullshit. “Every single day since I’ve met you.”
“Kreed, please. Fifteen minutes.”
His eyes searched mine as if he were trying to see if I was lying. Maybe I was. Just a little. I wasn’t planning to sneak outor do anything stupid… Not yet, but I did plan to fall apart. I did plan to let the scalding water drown out my sobs.
He sighed. “I’ll give you ten.”
I rolled my eyes even as I fought the tightness in my throat. “You’re such a tyrant.”
“And yet, I’m still here.”
I didn’t answer. Just turned and slipped into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. Screw keeping it open. I didn’t honestly believe a lock would keep him out anyway. If I were in trouble, he’d find a way inside.
Only when I twisted the shower knob and the water roared to life did I let myself slide down to the tile floor, my knees drawn to my chest. My breath hitched, and then it was all crashing down—my guilt, my fear, and my rage at the world and myself.
I buried my face in my arms and let the sobs come, silent and shaking, as steam filled the room, and the sound of the running water drowned out the truth: This was my fault.
With puffy,red eyes I couldn’t hide, I shuffled downstairs, my wet hair dampening the back of Kreed’s hoodie. He left it on the bed for me when I got out of the shower, and I couldn’t resist slipping it on. His woodsy sage and sea salt scent adhered to the soft material, enveloping me in a way that made it feel like his arms were around me.
Kreed wanted me to go on with my day as if my best friend wasn’t fighting for her life. I wasn’t sure I could. Doing so would require me to shut off my brain to keep from thinking about her, not a simple request for something that felt like it had its own will.
Somehow, by the light of day, everything seemed different. Definitely not clearer because I was just as uncertain last night as I was this morning about my decision. Maybe I should have gone to the police as Carson wanted. What was I doing thinking we could handle this alone? We were in fucking high school.
Not that I didn’t believe my cousin and the Elite were capable because I’d seen the aftermath from people who’d crossed them. And Kreed…
He had an inside to a part of Elmwood I wasn’t sure I wanted to be associated with, let alone know about. It might have been better if I’d been oblivious to the nefarious activity happening right under my nose, which my father had a hand in.
It wasn’t too late. I could still go to the police. Or I could keep going down this path, trusting Kreed.Or…I could give myself up, trade my life for Kenny’s.
Kreed and Brock would be beyond pissed. I didn’t want to imagine what that would do to them, the rage it would set off, but if it was me being held, being threatened, they had a higher stake. They would have more determination to find me.
It wasn’t that I didn’t believe they would do their damnedest to rescue Kenny. They would for me, but if it were me instead… There was nothing they wouldn’t do. Nothing. Frightening but also in a fucked-up way, comforting.
Of course, there was no way any of them would agree to such a stunt. They made their position in the matter very clear last night, but today was a new day. Perhaps we were all thinking clearer this morning. It was difficult to distinguish whether my emotions were making decisions or my head.
Whispers laced with sarcasm and muffled laughter floated down the hallway, their casual rhythm breaking the tense silence of the house. My socked feet padded against the hardwood, heart already prickling with suspicion. As I rounded the corner intothe kitchen, I half expected to find my cousin and the Elite in a hushed strategy session with Kreed.
But instead, it was a memory I didn’t expect to see again, one that belonged to another life entirely.
Raine was perched on the kitchen counter, casually spooning peanut butter straight from the jar. Maddox leaned against the fridge, pouring what suspiciously looked like rum into a coffee cup. Mason sat at the table, flipping a card between his fingers, the joker, if I had to guess, with a carefully stacked deck in front of him.