Page 106 of The Holy Grail
“I don’t know.” Jules sighed. “I’ve known him and had feelings for him longer than I have for you, which is kind of a mind fuck, to be honest.”
“I completely understand the mind fuck thing.”
“I’d have to really set aside my feelings for Evan, which will be more difficult now that I know about your history with him. Before yesterday, it wasn’t easy, but it was at least doable … but now it’s likenotdoable. Now, it’s like the wall I put between us and Evan got hit with a wrecking ball. Does that make sense?”
“It does. And I understand what you’re going through, because I did my best to not think about Evan during the past eight years, and it kind of worked, until yesterday. Then it quit working, and quit working big.”
Jules nodded, not surprised to hear that, as Malcom looked as tormented as she’d ever seen him. “That leaves our other option—”
“We adopt Evan?”
The dry comment actually made Jules laugh out loud. She couldn’t help but picture her and Malcom bringing Evan home and him running through the house like a kid, excited to see his new digs. “I was going to say ‘bring him into the fold’.”
“Same difference.”
“You don’t seem surprised by that option.”
“Well, we either go forward without him, or we go forward with him. Those are really the only two options.” Malcom cleared his throat. “And honestly, the first option doesn’t seem feasible.”
“I don’t think it is, either. Which leaves us with the second option, which is only feasible if both of us can commit to being all in.”
They stared at one another, both obviously expecting the other to speak next. As soon as they realized that, they both began talking.
“Would you—”
“Would you—”
They both stopped, looking at one another again.
“You go first,” she told him.
“Would you be able to be with Evan, and also share me with him?” he asked.
“Yes, to being with him. And I know I’d said Iwouldn’tbe able to share you with someone else, but … I could share you with him. It just feels like Evan is inevitable.” Then lowering her voice, she added, “I’m not saying it wouldn’t be a huge life adjustment for me, because I’ve never even been in a threesome before, so I’d have to learn how and where everything goes—maybe reading a few romance books wouldn’t hurt—”
“Romance books?”
“There’s a lot of romance books out there in that genre. I’m just supposing it might be beneficial to read a few,” she explained. “Anyway, I’d be willing to give this triad thing a hell of a try.”
He still seemed skeptical, as if he’d expected her to have more reservations or concerns. “You really wouldn’t feel strange about any of it?”
“Well, I imagine some of it might be strange, but I won’t know what that’ll be until I get there. I went through some strange stuff with you, though, and I survived—”
“What strange stuff?”
“Like … you leaving the toilet seat up.”
“That really doesn’t qualify as strange.”
“Says you, because you’ve never almost fallen into the toilet in the middle of the night.”
He made a face at her. “Jules, I’m talking about going out in public with two men, and having people see it, and likely being judgmental. That kind of stuff.”
“I don’t care what other people think, so I wouldn’t feel strange about that,” she replied, brushing his warning aside. “Plus, as you know, I have a gift for ignoring most judgmental people, and those who can’t be ignored, can be verbally dispatched pretty quickly.”
“What about telling your parents?”
She hardly had to think about that. “It would probably be something I tell them in person, but I wouldn’t have a problem doing it. And obviously I wouldn’t be doing it alone.”
