Page 103 of The Holy Grail
JULES: I should be there in ten minutes.
By the time she arrived home, the Motrin had actually started to kick in a little, but not enough to make her look like she wasn’t in bad shape as Malcom followed her inside her apartment.
“Are you okay?” he asked as she got a glass of water and drank half of it.
Jules saw him registering the fact she was still wearing yesterday’s clothes, but didn’t say anything about it, God bless him.
“I’m just a little hungover,” she replied, then went for full disclosure, because why wait? “I was with Evan last night, and we had a long conversation over too many shots of tequila. So, that’s why I look like this.”
Malcom sat down in the nearest chair, which was at her kitchen table. “You stayed with him all night?”
She was glad he didn’t lie and tell her she looked fine. “Yes. We ended up kind of passing out on the couch.”
He didn’t look overly pleased to hear that, but he didn’t ask if ‘anything happened’, which was either a testament to his trust in her, or his thinking it unlikely anythingcouldhave happened after ‘too many’ shots of tequila. Or, maybe it was both.
She sat down in the chair next to him, really admiring his restraint. If she was the one being told he’d passed out on the couch with someone who had a thing for him, after having a long conversation and a lot to drink, Jules probably would have become a little unhinged and demanded all the answers. “Most of the conversation revolved around you, him, and Gwen.”
He nodded, as if not in the least bit surprised.
While he listened, she filled him in on almost everything Evan had said, starting with the lesson on triads (minus the drawings), going through his point of view during the four month long ‘relationship’, and how he’d wanted the three of them to go to the next level and be completely interactive.
“I didn’t know any of that,” Malcom said, getting up to restlessly walk around the small kitchen, only to come back and sit down again.
“Apparently he contacted Gwen to talk about it and she was really awful to him.”
His dark eyebrows pinched together. “What?”
Jules told him what had transpired between Gwen and Evan and when she was finished, Malcom looked both distraught and pissed. “What a bitch.”
“That’s exactly what I said.”
He sighed. “I really didn’t know about any of that. I didn’t know Evan had those kind of feelings for me.”
“If you had known he loved you, would it have changed anything?”
Malcom pressed his lips together for a moment before getting up and walking around again. This time, however, he ended up in front of the cabinet that held her liquor, and pulled out her bottle of Maker’s Mark bourbon, despite it not even being 11:00 a.m., yet. Next, he found a glass and brought them both back to the table and sat down, before pouring himself several fingers.
The smell of the alcohol actually made Jules’ stomach churn a little, as did watching him take a long drink.
“I don’t know,” he said quietly.
His answer actually told her a lot. He didn’t deny it outright, which meant it potentiallycouldhave changed things. “I need you to be honest with me about this, Mal,” she said, reaching over and taking his free hand, the one not holding the bourbon. “I need to know if you had feelings for him.”
He took another long drink before answering. “Yes, I did.”
Jules waited until he met her gaze. “See? That wasn’t so hard.”
“It was, actually. It’s the first time I’ve ever admitted to having feelings for another man.”
Because he looked extremely vulnerable and uncomfortable, she got up and climbed onto his lap, straddling his legs. She then put her hands on his face and kissed him. When she pulled back, she asked, “Was Evan the first man you’ve had feelings for?”
“No. There was someone in high school, but … I don’t know if he was into guys or not. Not that I would have done anything about it if I’d known.” He finished off the bourbon in his glass. “How did Evan put it? I was in the closet with a couple of deadbolts on the inside of the door? Yeah, that was me. It kind of still is, actually.”
“Because you’re afraid to admit you’re bisexual?”
“A little bit. I’ve been fighting it and hiding it my whole life. So, admitting it—especially to you—is difficult.”
“Even though I told you it wouldn’t bother me at all?”
