Page 48 of Cherish and the Duke
“But this is who you are…the Duke of Bromleigh. And do you forget that I gave myself to you when we were younger? What more proof do you need that I wanted you? And I still want you. Are you really so deluded as to believe the young ladies at Lady Shoreham’s party care for you beyond your title? Do you think they want you in their bed?”
He knew quite well that most did not. Which was why he had no intention of offering for any of those little peahens.
“They flirt with you because they want to be your duchess,” she said, not yet done with her little speech. “Why do you not askthemto tell you the truth? Or are you afraid of what they will say? Then I shall tell you what they are all thinking, even your precious Lady Cherish.”
No, Cherish was different. She would melt at his touch, and lose her heart to him, if he kissed her.
“You are too old for them, and they will be repulsed by the intimacies you force on them, just as I was when my husband touched me. But I endured forus. I closed my eyes and pretended you were the one with me. After all I have been through, is this how I am to be rewarded for my sacrifice?”
“Rewarded?” He stared at her in disbelief. “You gave up on us building a life together, gave up on our happiness and our chance for children. You gave it all up without a thought for me, not even a letter of warning or a single conversation between us about your plans. You knew I would never agree, and you did not want me in a position to stop you.”
As he spoke, he had been watching her shifting expressions and noticed her look of disdain at the mention of children. That look did something to his heart. She did not want to raise a family and would not have been a good mother to any sons or daughters they might have had.
This truly tore him apart. How had he been so blind? How did he not see what she was? A beautiful woman whose thoughts were centered only on herself.
He sighed, accepting the truth now and knowing he shared the blame for remaining oblivious. “You wanted your fine carriages and expensive jewelry above the love I was willing to give you. Well, now you have them. You have all the trappings of wealth, more than most ladies can ever dream of. This is what you chose, Katie. Do not expect me to accept it. I would not have done so then and will not do so now.”
He had his failings as well, for he could have moved on and found someone else to marry. But he had used Katie’s betrayal as an excuse to close himself off. That part wasn’t her fault, only his.
Of course, he had not realized this was what he had been doing. All the while, he thought he had been searching for love.
He’d found it now with Cherish.
So why was he still playing matchmaker to her and Reggie? Or saying nothing as Fellstone hovered close?
He helped Katie back up on her horse and then mounted his own. Their ride back to Fiona’s stable was as breakneck and reckless as their ride out. He supposed they both had anger anddisappointment to work through. But their talk only firmed his resolve about Katie.
He wanted nothing to do with her.
There was not a chance in hell he would ever make her his duchess. She would think only of her own needs and never concern herself with the needs of others. This was not the sort of wife he wanted.
If ever hewereto marry, it had to be someone like Cherish—someone whose heart was tender and whose instincts were kind.
Well, he did not know why his thoughts were even straying there, for had he not made a mess of that, too? He shook back to the present as they approached Fiona’s manor.
Cherish was walking toward the stable as they rode up.
He immediately drew back on his reins to slow his mount, but Katie had no such intention. To his horror, she rode toward Cherish at full gallop and would have caused her serious injury if Cherish had not been alert and leaped out of the way in time.
But she fell backward and landed hard on the ground.
“Cherish!” He raced to her side, unable to restrain his fury, not only aimed at Katie but at himself for everything he had done wrong leading up to this moment.
He wrapped Cherish in his arms as she struggled to sit up. “Take another moment, love. You had the wind knocked out of you.”
Love?
Had he just let that endearment slip?
She was shaking hard and too overset to notice. “She ran me down on purpose.”
“I know. This is my fault.”
She looked up at him in surprise. “How is it yours?”
“Long story. Let’s get you back to the house,” he said, stopping her as she struggled to rise and was obviously havingdifficulty. “I did not mean to have you walking on your own. I’ll carry you back. Can you put your arms around my neck?”
“No, people will talk. Give me another moment to catch my breath and I’ll manage on my own. I think I am all right.” But she emitted a groaning laugh not a moment later and sagged against him. “This must be the Fates telling me I am not meant to be near horses.”
