Page 136 of Double Standards
Because Daniels might not have succeeded last night, but he was the one who pulled the trigger on Axel at Christmas. He was probably the one sending me flowers to scare me. And if Noah hadn’t shown up when he did—or at all—I don’t even want to think about what might’ve happened to me. The dread burrows under my skin, sticky and cold.
“Cassie,” Lexie says softly, her tone urging me to stay grounded. “It could have been a lot worse.”
I nod, but her words slide off me, barely absorbed.
“What did he have to say?”
I raise a brow. Does she really need to ask? She knows Axel’s fury, knows what kind of retaliation is probably already in motion.
“Right,” she chuckles dryly. “You want some coffee? I’m gasping for some.”
I glance at her, narrowing my eyes. “Why are you just coming in anyway?”
“I had errands to run.” She shrugs like it’s nothing, but there’s a tell-tale sign that she’s not being honest. It was the same the other night when I came home to the mess scattered around our apartment. Something feels...off between us. Not bad exactly, just distant. Like there’s a wedge I can’t quite see. Maybe some girl talk will soften the edges.
I watch her put the kettle on and busy herself with mugs. I wait until the scent of coffee fills the air before I slide onto a stool at the island.
“So, Hunter found you?” she asks, taking a sip from her mug.
I roll my eyes and wrap my hands around my mug. “Yeah, don’t get me started.”
“Why?”
“Because apparently, Hunter has been following me for a while.”
Lexie lifts a brow. “Really? How do you know that?”
“I overheard Axel chewing him out this morning. Said hedidn’t get to me in time. Apparently, he ‘tasked’ him with watching over me.”
“That’s sweet.”
“Sweet?” I scoff incredulously. “It’s controlling. It’s overbearing.”
“I don’t think he means it that way,” she says carefully, her gaze flicking to the marks on my face.
“Maybe not,” I mutter, my fingers tightening around the warm ceramic of my mug. I keep my gaze locked on the swirling surface of the coffee, watching the faint ripple from my breath. “But having his men follow me without telling me? That’s a line.”
The words taste bitter on my tongue. I don’t know if it’s guilt or anger that makes my chest feel tight, but the feeling is there, gnawing. Was I wrong to feel violated by that? Even if it came from a place of care? A place of protection? That kind of thing doesn’t feel like love—it feels like control. And Lexie? She’d be the first to call that out. She never hesitated to call Cooper out for being a controlling, manipulative asshole. So why does this feel different? Why do I feel like I’m the one crossing some unspoken boundary by even saying it aloud?
“Is Hunter really hismen, though?” Lexie tilts her head, her brow lifting with a knowing look.
That gives me pause. Fair point. Trigger had explained some of it to me before, how The Five weren’t just colleagues or soldiers, they were family. The kind of bond forged in blood and chaos. Hunter didn’t answer to Axel like an employee. They were brothers, chosen and loyal. Still…
“I guess not,” I sigh, letting the breath rush from me as I lean back slightly. “But that’s not the point.”
Lexie sets her mug down with a softclink, the sound oddly final. “Are you saying you don’t feel safe with them?”
The question lands harder than I expect. It’s not accusatory, not even defensive, but I see the flicker in her eyes. Hurt. Quiet,restrained, but there. She doesn’t say it, but I know her well enough to read the subtext:You used to feel safest with me.
My heart tugs. I hate that I’ve made her feel like that.
“Oh, no,” I say quickly, shaking my head, trying to erase the shadow I just cast between us. “I feel safest with them. No offense.”
Lexie’s lips twitch into a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “None taken.”
But I can tell something lingers behind her smile, something unspoken. Maybe it’s the time we’ve lost between us, the distance that’s grown without either of us meaning for it to. Maybe it’s jealousy. Maybe it’s worry. Or maybe, just maybe, it’s all of it.
But I know Lexie. I see what she’s not saying. I haven’t been around. We haven’t been us. And you can’t feel safe with someone who’s never there.
