Page 39 of All The Smoke
“I know, I just… never mind, my last period was…” I paused to pull my phone out to check my tracking app. When I saw that I had missed my period, my heart sank. “What the fuck?” I whispered, trying to close out of the app then bring it back up because there was no way in hell I missed my damn period.
“Mm, mm, mm.” She shook her head. “Please tell me it’s not that no good ass boy you were dealing with, Kaori.”
I wish it was.
Before I slept with Solomon, I hadn’t been with Jamal in months. He was cheating all the time and I was afraid he would potentially give me something, so I refused to sleep with him until he went to the doctor. When he did I still didn’t have sex with him. He needed to earn that back from me and sadly the night I was going to give in was the night I’d caught him with that girl.
Being pregnant by Jamal wouldn’t be the best thing in the world but it would be better than being pregnant by a man I barely knew.How the hell would I explain to my parents I was pregnant by a stranger?My mother would talk shit but it would be easier to tell her than my dad. He would be so disappointed because I knew better. He preached to me all the time to respect myself and my body and I was out here sleeping with random men with no protection.
Oh god! What if he gave me something?!
I instantly had a panic attack, hyperventilating, thinking the worst. I didn’t calm down until my grandmother basically slapped the shit out of me and helped me into a chair at the table right behind me.
“Girl, what the hell is wrong with you?” She frowned, taking a seat across from me, pouring some of my Gatorade in a cup then handing it to me.
“Thank you, Granny,” I said after I downed the drink.
“Kaori, what is going on with you?”
Tears streamed down my face as I thought about how my life had gone down the drain in the last few months. Nothing was the same at all. My love life was in shambles, my parents were basically saying fuck me and making me take care of myself, and I was maybe pregnant with an asshole stranger’s baby. Saying it out loud and seeing the look of disappointment on my grandmother’s face made it worse.
“Kaori, suck that shit up,” she spat and tossed some paper towels my way. “You act like it’s the end of the world.”
“It is, Granny! A baby with a man I don’t know like that is insane.”
“Was it insane when you were doing it?”
“I wasn’t really thinking when I was doing it.”
“Clearly,” she countered and I sighed heavily.
“Now I have to figure this out.”
“What’s there to figure out?”
My brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”
“I mean exactly what I said, what the hell is there to figure out? Hell, the damage is done. You’re pregnant and you’re keeping it.”
“Granny—”
“Make me toss this hot ass food on you,” she threatened. “You are not getting rid of that baby.”
“Did you not hear me tell you I don’t know the father that well and he basically treated me like a hoe?”
“You mean you carried yourself like one?” My eyes narrowed into slits and I had to fight hard not to be disrespectful. “Don’t look at me like that, it’s true.”
“I didn’t carry myself like a hoe, Granny.”
“No?” She angled her head to the side. “So you didn’t procreate with a man you don’t know past his son having a toothache and needing an extraction just to get back at another man?”
“Yes, but?—”
She cut me off. “Nope, I don’t need to hear anything else. Go on up there and shower. By the time you get out I’ll have this soup fixed up for you.”
Not in the mood to go back and forth nor did I want to test the theory and see if she really would throw the hot food on me, I grabbed my purse and phone and made my way up the steps. I shot Morgan a text along the way to go to the store and meet me here. I needed her to bring a test so I could confirm, then I’d go from there.
Even though my granny said what she said, I still needed to not only weigh my options and decide what I was going to do, I needed to figure out how to tell Solomon. It was his baby too, so it was only fair to include him in whatever decision I was going to make.
