Page 41 of Bad for Business
If they don’t accept you because they don’t even know you, that’s an easy pill to swallow.
But what if you open up to someone and show them the most vulnerable parts of yourself, just for them to still not accept you? That’s devastating. A feeling I avoid at all costs.
Ryker waits patiently, something that takes me by surprise. He’s not patient. Ever. Yet here he is, allowing me the time I need to answer his question without feeling the need to fill the silence.
“I’m just shy,” I offer, my fingers twisting the end of my hair around my finger. “And reserved,” I add as an afterthought.
Ryker shakes his head. “That’s a cop-out. Give me the real answer.”
My lips part in shock. I wasn’t expecting him to be so blunt and call me out.
“I don’t know, Ryker,” I answer, my gaze moving to the ground. I can’t look into his brown eyes for another second. “It’s just who I am. I’ve always been this way.”
Why is it that the one person I should have my guard up around the most is the one person I’m wanting to let in at this very moment?
I jump when his fingers connect with my chin. He gently coaxes my face up until my eyes meet his.
He’s closer than I was expecting, his broad shoulders and chiseled face blocking out the rest of the world, so I can’t focus on anything but him.
“But that’s not actually true. The more I think about it, the more I know that’s a lie. You made me work for it, but you opened up for me the night we met. You can lie to yourself, you can even lie to the rest of the world, but you can’t lie to me. You don’t always have to be defensive. You’re just choosing to be.”
His gaze flicks to my lips as his words unravel me. My chest feels heavy, and for some reason, my eyes sting with unshed tears. I don’t know what it is about his words that cut deep, but they slice right through me.
He doesn’t have the right to point out that I opened up to him. Not when he wanted nothing to do with me the next morning.
Ryker’s fingers glide along my jawline until he cups my face.
He leans in, and the heat in his eyes and the way his tongue peeks out to wet his lips tells me he wants to kiss me.
Matter of fact…I think he’sgoingto kiss me.
His face gets closer, his breath caressing my lips.
“Do me a favor and don’t get defensive,” he says, his voice slightly shaking. “At least open up enough to let me kiss you again.”
I wonder if he can feel my racing pulse underneath his fingertips. My body shakes with anticipation. Or maybe it’s with the fear of letting him do this to me again. I’ve opened up to him before and he made me instantly regret it.
His lips brush against mine with the lightest touch before I’m pushing his body away from mine and putting as much distance between us as possible.
No matter how badly I want him to kiss me, it can never happen again.
TWENTY-THREE
RYKER
My hand dropsto my side as I watch Camille run away from me. I see her leaving, disappearing into the house and out of my view, but it takes time for my brain to process that she’s no longer in front of me.
I blink and wonder what the hell just happened.
I swear she was giving me all the signs that she wanted me to kiss her.
“Fuck,” I mutter under my breath, my senses finally coming to me.
I quickly stand up and chase after her. I’m not going to let her avoid this. I can’t. I have to know if I was wrong in thinking she wanted to kiss me just as badly as I wanted to kiss her.
“Camille!” I yell, walking through the back doors and scanning the house. She isn’t in the kitchen or living room. I head down the hallway toward her room. The sound of a door slamming lets me know exactly where she is.
I close the distance to her bedroom. I’m not surprised at all to find her door closed. I shouldn’t have moved so fast by the pool. I wasn’t thinking straight. She just actually seemed to be letting me in for once, and I got ahead of myself. I saw the woman who captured my attention months ago, and I couldn’t think straight.
