Page 67 of To Bed the Bride
She reached for the plate, but handed it to Eleanor first. She declined with a smile.
Logan waited until the housekeeper left the room again before turning to Eleanor.
“He’s a bastard. Not only for what he said about Bruce, but for making you cry.”
“He didn’t make me cry,” she said. “You did. I didn’t lie to Mrs. Campbell. I was hoping that you would save Bruce and you have. I didn’t know what else to do.”
He startled her by moving to sit on the ottoman. Bruce tried to get into his lap again and Logan picked up the puppy and held him at eye level. “You’ll mind your manners, Bruce. Or it’s to the back you’ll go.”
Bruce licked his nose.
Logan laughed, then put the puppy back down on the rug before turning to her. Reaching out, he grabbed both of her hands.
“I’ll give him a home, Eleanor. You needn’t worry about him anymore.”
“Could I come and visit him from time to time? He’s such a dear little thing and I’ve grown to love him.”
He looked down at her hands.
“I won’t be a bother,” she said.
“Of course you can come and visit him,” he said. “I think, under the circumstances, however, that it would be easier if you came when I wasn’t here.”
Perhaps it would be easier for him, but not for her. Even a chance to see him would be enough to make her anticipate the day.
That confession would never be said, couldn’t be said. It’s not just that the words were disloyal, but that they were wrong. She was engaged to another man. She was going to be his wife. She couldn’t fall in love with Logan McKnight. She couldn’t.
She shouldn’t have come. She shouldn’t have made the situation even worse. If she hadn’t been so worried about Bruce’s fate she wouldn’t have.
“Logan...” Her words ground to a halt. She couldn’t say to him,Let me into your life. Let me be a part of it, however small. Talk to me about your day. Tell me of the legislation you want to get passed. Who did you argue with today? What did you learn?
She had no right to any of his time, his thoughts, or his experiences.
The best thing to do was return to her aunt’s home and never look back. She wouldn’t return to see Bruce. She wouldn’t communicate with Logan. She would face her future and think of him as a distant memory or perhaps even a dream.
Otherwise, it would be too painful.
She’d never questioned her own bravery. Yet she knew that leaving without a chance of seeing Logan again would require more courage than she’d ever demonstrated. More than leaving Hearthmere.
Perhaps she wasn’t brave enough. She couldn’t lose both of them. Not just yet.
“What day would be best for you?” she asked.
“Wednesdays.”
“Then I’ll come on Wednesdays,” she said. “In the afternoon.”
“And I’ll be absent on Wednesdays.”
She nodded. What else could she say? If he didn’t want to see her again she understood. It would be easier for both of them. Yet she’d still be able to see Bruce, until such time as even that would be difficult. She didn’t know if she would be living at Abermarle or London after the wedding. Wherever it was, it would be solely at Michael’s discretion.
“Thank you,” she said, grabbing her satchel. She placed it between them. “Bruce’s blanket is in there, along with his rope toy. He appropriated one of my shoes and I included that, too.”
It shouldn’t be so difficult to turn over Bruce’s belongings, but somehow it was.
“Stay for tea,” he said. “Otherwise, Mrs. Campbell will get her feelings hurt.”
She had the feeling that he would do anything rather than allow Mrs. Campbell to be hurt. Was he that considerate of all the employees in this surprisingly large house? She suspected he was. Just another facet of this man. This amazing, fascinating, enchanting man.
