Page 27 of Tangled Hearts
“Yea. I just… I gotta figure out what home gon’ look like now.”
As she turned and walked off, her shoulders squared a little. The weight wasn’t gone, but it had shifted. It was still heavy but now she had something to balance it with.
She wasn’t a statistic. She wasn’t a failure. She was a girl tryna do right, even after doing wrong.
This time, Shakeisha believed she could.
Standing in front of the closet, Knycole and Noir fussed over the outfit Knycole chose to wear.
“Girl, you don’t have to look like you’re going to a damn funeral,” Noir fussed as she tugged on Knycole’s shirt trying to pull it over her head.
Slapping her hand away, Knycole rolled her eyes. “Shit, I feel like I’m going to a funeral. I miss Rock so much, and you aren’t even trying to understand my feelings.”
Noir sighed. “I do understand, but I don’t feel like your life should stop because he’s locked up. Live it up, and when he gets home, you’ll be ready for him. Plus, it’s gonna be some fine ass niggas over there, and I need to replenish by contact list.”
“That’s all your hoe ass is thinking about. And how do you plan on doing that with Paul’s ass standing over you like you’re his property?”
She waved her hands in the air. “He already knows what time it is. He is not my man, and I make sure to remind him daily. Plus, you know how sneaky my ass is. I’ll be fucking in the back, and he won’t even know it.”
“Bitch! I can’t stand you because you’re so fake. You know good and damn well your ass ain’t about to be fucking in the back.” Knycole dismissed her.
The two of them giggled because she was one hundred percent right. Noir liked to talk to a lot of boys at the same time, but that was where it began and ended. They would break her off in hopes of sampling what was between her thighs. She’d string them along long enough until they couldn’t take it anymore, then she’d release them back into the sea.
“Ma said come eat, y’all,” Noir’s younger brother burst through the doors to announce.
It had been so long since Knycole had a real homecooked meal that she didn’t hesitate to run out the room knowing she needed something on her stomach before she put any liquor in it. Plus, Noir’s mama could throw down. She was strict as hell, but a good mother, nonetheless.
“Slow down, girl,” Nakorea, Noir’s mother fussed. “This food ain’t going nowhere.”
Knycole nodded, feeling a little embarrassed.
Nakorea saw the look on her face and lightened the mood. “I know my food is bomb, so I guess you get a pass.” Her warm smile brightened Knycole’s spirit.
“It is. I tried to make a meatloaf like you and failed.” Knycole laughed at her truth.
“You should’ve called and asked for the recipe. I might as well teach you to cook since Noir don’t know how to boil water.” Nakorea threw a soft shot at her daughter.
“Ma, don’t do me like that,” Noir pouted.
Daijon, Noir’s brother, plopped down at the table. “No lie was told,” he chimed in ducking his head when Noir swung on him. “You gotta be quicker than that.” He laughed, making everyone else join in as well.
Knycole sat at the table in a conflicted position. On one hand, she felt out of place, and on the other, she was envious. In her opinion, Noir had the perfect life, even though they were all from the same place. Watching the picture-perfect ghetto family, her heart ached wishing Nick had raised her better. The feeling of her phone vibrating in her pocket jarred her form her somber thoughts. An unknown number flashed across the screen, and she prayed for it to be Rock.
“Hello?” she answered eagerly.
“Knyc, it’s me, Nick. I was umm… I was just calling to check in on you to see if you were okay.” Her father’s uncertain voice sounded through the phone.
She was both disappointed and shocked. Disappointment by the caller not being Rock and shocked because it was her daddy. He’d never called and checked in on her but it felt good.
She looked around the table where all eyes were on her. “Yes, I’m good. Just over Noir’s house. Ms. Nakorea cooked and we’re about to eat.”
“Good, good, good. I’ll call you back in the morning.”
“Um, where you at?” She found her voice to ask. Her heart had already told her where her father had gone but she needed to know for sure. Knycole loved the idea of living in a peaceful house with her daddy gone, but hated the idea of the house being too silent. The fear of being alone was debilitating for her and no matter how she tried to hide it or mask it as being,okay, she really wasn’t.
“I’m at this nice little, um… I’m in rehab.” He stuttered. Nick knew it was what his daughter wanted but he wasn’t sure he could complete it and stay clean. His demons rode his back like a jockey riding a horse.
Exhaling shakily, she relaxed her body. It felt good knowing he received what she said and he was trying. That was all she could ask for. If God answered prayers, she knew he would deliver more than that. Knycole was going to be patient and still.
