Page 115 of Tangled Hearts
The night’s events made him want to let her know because in the blink of an eye, life could end. He wanted her to understand his love was never wavering even when she was unsure about where he fit into her new life.
Inside the car, Knycole pulled out as Noir sniffled. “I hate him, Knyc… I hate him so bad,” she cried.
“I know, boo… it’s gonna be okay though.”
“And I hate myself for getting so wrapped up in a man when I knew better. I knew not to fall in love with him, Knyc… but I did and,” Noir heaved. “And now I don’t know who I am anymore.”
The car filled with her sobs. Knycole’s hands tightened on the wheel, her throat thick from her own issues. She didn’t haveanswers. Not when her life was just as much a mess as her best friend’s. All Knycole could do was drive and be there.
Noir pressed her palms to her eyes, shoulders shaking. “He got me out here fighting bitches in a park. He got me ducking guns, Knyc. I was raised better than this. I’m better than this.” She dragged in a shaky breath. “And I still love him. That’s the part that’s killing me. I still fuckin’ love him.”
Her words sat heavy, weighing down the air between them.
Knycole reached over, squeezing her thigh. “You’re not weak, Noir. You just love hard. Too hard for somebody who don’t know how to handle it.”
Noir turned her face to the window, tears streaking her cheeks. “Then what’s left of me if I gave him all I had and it still wasn’t enough?”
The silence afterward wasn’t just empty. It was the sound of two girls carrying more pain than they should have at their age—bound by loyalty, love, and choices that kept cutting them open.
CHAPTER 27
Mae Lou’sscreen door swung open with that same creak Rock remembered from his childhood. He walked in holding Rodeisha’s hand, Shakeisha right behind him with a foil pan. The home had been upgraded while he was away, courtesy of Knycole and Hov.
Rocky came running from the back room, hair twisted up, graduation cap sitting on the table behind her. She was seventeen now, not the little girl who used to beg Rock to push her on the swing in Mae Lou’s yard. “Rock!” she grinned, pulling Rodeisha into a hug before looking up at him. “I got my gown. You coming to see me walk, right?”
“Hell yea,” Rock grunted, pulling her into a half hug. “You know I ain’t missing my baby sister walking across that stage.”
Rocky smirked. “I’m trying to set the bar.”
Mae Lou came from the kitchen, wiping her hands. “Set it high, baby. Don’t let nobody drag you under it.” Her eyes flicked to Rock, softening for the first time all day. “Y’all hungry? I just finished… everything’s hot and fresh.”
Shakeisha set her pan down. “I made yams.”
Mae Lou chuckled. “Alright, girl. Let’s see if they better than mine.” She looked at Rodeisha. “You come sit by Mae Mae.”
“Okay,” Rodeisha bounced on her toes, excited to sit by Mae Lou.
This was Rock’s third time bringing his baby by. The first time, Mae Lou cried before cussing him out and calling Hov knowing he knew all along.
Rock still felt a knot in his chest every time Hov’s name came up. He’d grown up leaning on Hov in ways he couldn’t even admit out loud. They were boys who turned into men together, each loss carving them both, each mistake shared like it belonged to both of them. He loved him. That was never in question. It was the kind of love that kept him up at night, wondering how they got so far from what they used to be.
He remembered Hov being the only one to put money on his books. The only one to answer every call from the county phone. The one who made sure Rodeisha had diapers when Rock couldn’t. That wasn’t something you forgot. But the same closeness that kept Rock alive inside those walls was what made their distance now cut so deep. He wanted to reach for him, but pride kept his hand in his pocket.
Watching Mae Lou talk to his daughter, hearing her say Hov’s name so casually, it reminded Rock that no matter how much he tried to bury it, his heart still tied itself to his brother. And the truth was, he missed him. Missed the bond, missed the respect, missed the family they were supposed to build side by side. Even when anger rose up, love was stronger.
They gathered at the table. Rodeisha kicked her legs, talking about her doll like it was her best friend. Rocky showed off her nails for prom. Shakeisha laughed, telling her not to get in trouble, and Mae Lou kept fussing at everyone to eat more. Rock leaned back in his chair, watching the scene. It was loud, a little messy, but it was family. For a minute, he let himself just breathe. Relax.
“Knyc taking me to look at dresses,” Rocky slipped and said.
Shakeisha choked.
Rocky cringed. “Sorry.”
“No, you’re good, there’s no bad blood on my end. I also understand she’s your family so I’m not trippin’.” Shakeisha winked.
Shakeisha understood the intricate ways Knycole was tied into Rock’s family. That didn’t have anything to do with her. Rock was a grown man and last she checked, he wasn’t her man to check or run up behind. That and Shakeisha wasn’t the same person she used to be. There was no need for her to even pretend to claim him. She loved him more than she wished she did but she wasn’t going to force his hand. All she needed him to do was take care of his daughter and be a good daddy.
“Roddy, you gotta crumble the cornbread into the greens like this,” Mae Lou showed Rodeisha how to properly eat greens.
