Page 213 of Falling Backwards
They both let out a laugh, Emma’s more like a guffaw while Joy’s is delighted.
“Were they embarrassing pictures?”Emma asks.“Please say yes!”
“No, they were funny and adorable.Old Halloween costumes and whatnot.”I won’t tell them about the fake-weapons-in-swim-trunks ones.That’s a bit of treasure I’m keeping for myself.
Joy is groaning.“Ilovelittle-kid Halloween costume pictures.Kids are so freakingcute.I can’t wait to have one.”
“So have one,” Emma says nonchalantly.
“Pff.With whom?My failed blind date?”
“Oh-ho,” I laugh lowly.I remember that small and unique disaster, but not the guy’s name.“What was his—?”
“Afton,” Joy says flatly.
Emma snickers.“Oh, yeah, that guy.Or, hey, what about Bradley from that dinner?”
Now with a slump, Joy says, “He turned out to be a sleaze.”
“Oh.Well, bye to him, then.”
I wince and add, “I’m sorry, Joy.”
She nods.“So am I, so yeah, he’s a no.And if I asked Afton to have a kid with me, he would probably be like,‘And have my child be born with pink hair?Never!’”
We all bust out laughing at that.
I ask, “He would be worried about your dyed-pink hair passing on to your kid, huh?”
Emma interjects, “Probably!That guy was a fool!”
Joy agrees, “Yep, he was, so yep, he probably would!”
New laughter takes us and, man, I miss Luke, but I also missed my friends while they were gone.
Joy points at Emma.“All right, tell us about your Thanksgiving!”
Emma’s eyes go wide as she glances between us.She smacks the couch cushions on either side of her thighs.“Y’all.My sister was talking wedding plans.Sheactually isplanning carrot cake for her wedding cake.”
Joy and I explode into disbelief that Emma joins right in on.“Maggie totally called that a long time ago!”overlaps with, “Oh my gosh!What if no one else eats it and they wasted their money?”and with, “Why the hell do people like vegetables in their cake?”
Although I wouldn’t choose to have carrot cake at my own wedding, I have to grin while Emma goes on talking about Kennedy’s plan.This recap of Thanksgiving with the Haledons is most certainly only just beginning, and I can’t wait to hear it all.Then Joy will be up, and her moms are always entertaining, so I’m looking forward to hearing about them and their holiday too.
I pull the throw blanket off the back of my cushy chair and settle in.
—
While I lie in my bed in the quiet darkness, waiting for Luke to say goodbye to Paxton and then call me, my mind drifts over…well, a lot of things.
How weird it already feels to be in bed alone.How difficult it had been for me to think about work instead of Luke, especially when finding him with my eyes was so damn easy.How much I enjoyed donating necessities to the homeless shelter and food bank.How glad I am that my friends and I all had good holidays and are safe—and, gosh, how surprised and optimistic I still am about Luke pointing out that it’s been almost a full week since anything last happened with Kyle.
I also dwell for a time on how I should’ve brought some of my and Luke’s chocolate cake home with me.It’s so good.We absolutely need to make it again soon.Maybe for Christmas?
That sets me on a train of thought to our future.
I can’t believe how badly I want a future with him.
Can’t believe itin a way,I mean.In all other ways, of course I can.Look at him, at who he is.Look how much warmer and softer he became after we let ourselves take a long enough breather from our bullshit to meet each other all over again instead of hanging on to old hostility.Look how much warmer and softerIhave become.
