Page 159 of Falling Backwards
But when I finally looked up from my plate, I saw he was just trying to chew a big bite of food.The way he was nodding and letting out a muffled laugh and gesturing in a, ‘Just a second,’way made me smile.
And once his mouth wasn’t full, he said, “Yeah, no problem.I’ll sleep at your place or you can sleep at mine.Whatever you’d like.”
I felt as intensely relieved as I did intensely fluttery.“Really?It won’t bother you?”
He gave me a long look that made the flutters worse.“No, it won’t bother me at all.”Then he said, “It’ll make me happy to keep making sureyou’rehappy and safe.”His next pause brought a chuckle.“And to get to offer you my sweatpants again.”
I laughed with him, and he was so cute it kind of killed me.
Even better was how he insisted I go to his mom’s with him on Thanksgiving Day.Those eyes made quick work of convincing me that both he and she would love having me there, and he didn’t argue when I bargained that I’ll help cook somehow.In fact, he said it sounds fun because he usually picks up a few precooked items from the store to take with him; this time, he and I can continue our culinary adventures by preparing two or three homemade dishes.
I felt really good about all of it, and I still do…though if I think too long on us intentionally staying with each other overnight, my heartbeat freaks out.Not because I’m anxious about it, but because it’s one more idea that bitter Maggie would’ve refused to entertain.And because I’m both eager to snuggle with him again and shocked at how eager I am for it.And because I can’t forget or ignore how stirred I’ve been by him in more breathtaking ways—can’t help wondering what more could…what moremight….
Those thoughts kind of make me ache.
Our kisses come back into my mind for the umpteenth time, which doesn’t help anything.
Also didn’t help that when I texted Emma and Joy to assure them I’ll be safe while they’re gone, they started in with flirty emojis and mentions of me and Luke having lots of‘fun’together—and that’swithoutthem knowing he kissed me.
‘I can feel your blush from here!’Emma had said while Joy sent multiple laughing emojis.
I believed she could.
Thankfully, Luke wasn’t in view of it at that moment, so I didn’t have to dodge any questions or jokes from him.
Hell, I’m blushing again now.
Smiling, too, though, because I love my friends and I’m glad we all get to enjoy our Thanksgiving holidays.My nervousness about Kyle has affected quite enough of our day-to-day lives.
More dinner patrons walk through Lucent’s entrance, so I let my smile shine even brighter as I get ready to greet them.I’m in a great mood, and they look to be in one too.
After I’ve seated them, I get another look at Mr.and Mrs.Matthews.They’re holding hands on one side of their table while they talk.There’s clear familiarity and respect and affection there.
‘Be kind,’I remember she told me when I asked for relationship advice.
She said a couple should be kind…and build a safe place with each other.
As I head to my stand once again, I slip my gaze to the bar once again, too, and see Luke shaking a metal container back and forth while he chats and grins with the gentleman seated in front of him.
I realize he’s shaking that thing—making a martini or something—with the same hand I held to my chest this morning on his couch.
And as my skipping pulse follows my brain back over those minutes and the kisses and the other minutes we shared before work and tons of other recent ones, I can’t help feeling likewehave been building a safe place with each other.
In a couple ways, it resembles the one from long ago, but in most ways, it’s something all its own.A haven like no other, unexpected though it is.
He serves the man his drink, which does appear to be a martini.Then he lets his eyes drift over here.They find me and his smile becomes something new, too, boasting a happiness all its own, a show of warmth like no other.
I take a deep breath, hoping to calm myself so I can refocus on work.But of course I smile back at him before I do that; there’s no resisting.
Then I return my attention to my stand.As I spot the iPad, something I thought of a minute ago comes back to me: I need to obtain Mr.Polk’s approval to surprise the Matthews table with double desserts later on, if it turns out they’ve only chosen one.During that certain phone call with the missus, I recall her saying she and her husband would have to ponder which of two sweet treats to get tonight.I still think they deserve both.
True love is such a precious thing.It should be celebrated in any way it can be—big and small, loud and quiet, grand and simple alike.
CHAPTER
TEN
