Page 36 of Free-Falling
She looks gutted. Like I just spat in her face. “It just does.”
“That’s fucking great, but why?”
“Because my feelings hurt. I feel betrayed, Jag. I feel like I don’t matter to anyone. Like my feelings are for everyone to stomp on.” She confesses.
“Now, you know my name, huh? Good. Always remember it. And another thing, Ainslee. Yes, you have every right to feel betrayed, but why do you want to feel that? Why do you feel you don’t matter to anyone?”
“What kind of shitty questions are those? You’re just repeating what I said back to me.” She’s getting frustrated. Good.
“Right. Am I, though? Or am I asking you why you give a fuck about two fucks who don’t give a fuck about hurting you!” I say. My voice is growing louder.
“Because!” She shouts.
“Because what? Ainslee? Who are these people to you that you should give a fuck, huh? Why do they feel bold enough to shake up your peaceful world, huh?WHY DO YOU GIVE THEM THAT KIND OF POWER!”I yell.
Ainslee jumps, sitting up straight. I’ve never yelled at her in my life or raised my voice like this and now, she’s on high alert. Not that she thinks I’ll do something negative to her, but she’s confused. She doesn’t understand what I could be so angry about. I’m not angry that she’s reacting, she’s allowed to but where they’ve got her fucked up is that they think they can do this to her. Embarrass her like she’s nothing. My wife is not nothing.
“Wh-, why are you yelling?” Ainslee asks. Tears escape her eyes. Even if she’s pretty when she cries, it doesn’t mean I want her to cry all the time.
I move fast and stand right in her face. I grab her jaw hard and make her look at me. I get all up in her face. “I don’t give a fuck about Eli, I definitely don’t give a fuck about Lina. If she wants to have his kid just to screw you over, that’s on her. You don’t bring kids into this world for revenge. I don’t want to fucking hear about those two in this house. This is my house, our house. I’m your fucking man and I plan on being the center of your world. So, Eli can suck a dick and choke on it for all I care. You’re mine, and that’s how it’ll always be. I may have given up Layla and you may have given up Eli, but baby, I’m not giving you up for nothing. I’ll fight for you, Ainslee Hanlon. I’ll fight for you even harder if that’s what it takes to show you I love you.” I lean in kissing her hard, and then I pull away. “I’m going to bed now before I take you a little too roughly.” I kiss her lips again and leave, ready to shower.
It’s like in the back of my mind, I knew that she would follow me in the shower. I don’t turn around when Ainslee’s small palm lands on my back. I continue to wash my hair like I didn’t feel a thing, but my entire body is on fire. I know how much I want her. How much I need her, but I need her to figure out her shit.
Her hand runs down my body, caressing every part of me. She gets to my ass then she starts a trail back up my back but this time, it involves the tip of her nails. I groan, turning around and slamming her into the shower wall.
“Sex isn’t a fucking apology, Ainslee.”
“I know, Jag. I know. Just hear me out, yeah?”
“Let me finish taking a shower then.” I reply.
She shakes her head. “No, here is perfect.” She says. “I want you to know that you are rapidly becoming the Center of my world. That I was just hurt but not to where I could ever,” she looks away, ashamed.
“Pull a fucking gun on me? Baby, I am not one of your lackeys or your boys. I’m your husband and you will do well to recognize that.”
“Yes, sir.” Ainslee replies being cheeky.
I can’t help the small smile that I break out in, but then I wipe it away. “Ains, if you don’t want me to take you as hard as I want tonight, please leave. I can’t be gentle with you right now. I need to calm down.”
Ainslee reaches out and scratches my chest. I groan looking down at the mark she’s made then back up at her. “You don’t know how to be gentle, Jagger, you never have and that’s okay. I want you to see all of me, bare.”
I tilt my head. “I’ve seen all of you, Ains.”
“No, you haven’t, not really.” She turns to show me her scars.
“I’ve seen them, baby. Countless times when you were sleeping. I’ve traced over them, soothing what is a memory of pain for you. I’ve kissed every single scar and whispered sweet words to them. I’ve seen all of you and I want you even more.” I admit to her.
Ainslee doesn’t turn around, instead she places her forehead on the tile, “Jagger, I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have done that. I know it seems like I’m changing the subject, but I’m not. What I did was disrespectful as fuck. I just, I don’t know why I give them that kind of power.”
I step in closer, caging her to my body. “You give them power they should never have,” I start. “Lesson two, Ainslee, power is a façade. It’s not real. I’ve learned a thing or two in my lifetime about women. You’re all attracted to power. Men who appear as though they have that power or those who exude it, but you’ve got one thing wrong there, baby.”
“What’s that?” Ainslee asks. Her breath hitches as soon as I lean in kissing her shoulder. I bite it for added measure. I reach around and cup her pussy. I turn her around to face me. I probe her asshole again, and Ainslee throws her head back. I reach down, playing with her clit at the same time. She’s so damned wet. Fuck.
I grunt, trying to concentrate. I have a lesson to finish. “Women hold the real power. Your creation is a blessing for us, men. You’re only attracted to what you exude. You think you want someone who overpowers you, but truly, you want to feel like an equal. You want to dominate me sometimes, Ains, I see it in your eyes.” She looks right in my eyes at this. I stare right back at her as I slowly insert two of my fingers in her puckered hole. She gasps and is on the tip of her toes.
“You want to fuck me as much as I fuck you. You want to ride my dick and make me cum just as much so fuck giving up your power. I don’t want to overpower you, baby, I want to fuck my equal. I don’t have power over you just like you don’t have power over me, but it doesn’t mean I can’t fuck you like I own you. Like I’ve branded you deeper than this skin. I’m in your goddamn bloodstream, Ainslee.” I stop playing with her clit and increase the speed in her ass. I bite her lip hard, and Ainslee’s hands shoot up gripping my biceps. Her nails dig into my skin breaking it as she cums so hard, I smile like a fool.
“Oh Jagger…” she says as she rests her head on my chest.
