Page 60 of Dear, Carson McDermott
“Wake up! Wake the fuck up, bitch!” I hollered.
This last slap not only woke him up, but it was as if a dose of caffeine had entered his body because he was wide awake.
“Wha-, who? Who the fuck are you?” He screamed.
I smiled wickedly,
“I guess, I haven’t introduced myself properly. Hi, my name is revenge. Have you ever played Russian roulette?”
Without so much as a warning, I brought my hand up the one with the gun and I shot him in his thigh, so close to his dick, he wasn’t sure what to do. He yelled out in pain; I knew how excruciating the pain was, I laughed.
“Oops, there’s only supposed to be one bullet in here,” I shrugged, “Well, I guess I’ll save this for later. Stanislav would like to play with you first.” I winked at him as I stepped back in the dimmed area as this big, six-foot seven-man who looked like he ate men for fun stepped in the space that I was in.
“Wait!” Ricardo screamed out as if now realizing what was going on. “Who the fuck are you and what have I done to you?”
I put my hand up, pausing Stanislav. I got closer to Ricardo; I grabbed his jaw gripping it as if I was ready to break it. He could swallow my rage at how close I was to him.
“You don’t know me huh? You sick fuck. You had the fuckin’ audacity to masturbate in front of my child and succumb him to some perverted shit and now you sit here in front of me sayin’ you don’t know who I am? Mark my words, today, you die.”
Ricardo sharply inhaled.
“Lil’ Bubba?” He called out to me. I saw the change in his eyes, the weird admiration that sparkled in his eyes made me take several steps back.
“What the fuck?” I said out of shock.
My father noticed what was happening and he grabbed my wrist, forcefully pulling me behind him. Any other day, I’d laugh because I was a bit taller than my dad but today, I was reduced to a small child. The five-year-old me seeing a predator in front of me as he eyed me like he wanted me in a way that I knew he wasn’t supposed to.
I didn’t even realize what was happening until my dad swung his arm and his fist connected with Ricardo’s jaw. He broke it. There was a reason why I never challenged my dad or rather why no one ever challenged him because he was nuts. He was an enforcer for a good reason and also because he knew how to hit with such impact that it would hurt the most. It was only one punch, but Ricardo screamed and tried to reach out to nurse himself, but he was tied to the chair in front of him.
“Look at my son that way again, I will pluck your eyes out and make sure you can’t die. If you don’ believe me, just test me.”
Ricardo had the nerve to cry. He quickly glanced my way and then back to my dad,
“You don’ understand’,” he slurred, clearly still drunk add that broken jaw too. “I love him. I’ve loved him since he was a kid. There’s just something’ bout him that draws me to him and even now, I shouldn’t love ‘em but I do. You took him away from me, so I took the only thin’ you both loved! I needed somethin’ that belonged to bubba. My Lil’ bubb-,”
He didn’t get to finish his sentence as my father attacked him again.
My dad gave blow after blow each one further breaking Ricardo’s face in. My father, who was dressed in a black suit looking like a high-end lawyer who was coming from an important court case, used his fists like he was drinking water. When my father finished, he ran his fingers through his neck-length dark brown hair that had a hint of salt and pepper in it. He turned to face me,
“Take your power back. If you don’ do it, he’ll always have it.”
I nodded once.
I moved closer to Ricardo. At first, I wasn’t sure what to do but then the fact that I reacted this way pissed me off and then I thought of Jude. I couldn’t let Jude grow up like me; uncertain of himself, not able to look at his abuser in the eyes. There were so many things I couldn’t remember before, but it all swam back into my mind at the time. Like when Ricardo went as far as to try to pleasure a five-year-old me, but it wasn’t that, it wasn't pleasuring. It was perversion and it was warped. I didn’t understand what was going on and I didn’t want to.
I grabbed the first knife I had. It was a hunting knife, one I crafted and precisely carved out. The curve of the knife was my favorite part and don’t get me started on the grip.
“Son? Are you doing’ that weird thang that you do when you stare at your knives?” My dad asked.
I gripped it nicely and then stabbed Ricardo in his right thigh, the same exact area that I knew the bullet was lodged in. Ricardo screamed but I didn’t hear any of it as I turned back to my dad like a scolded kid.
“Pop come on! You know I take good care of my knives. Don’ make it weird now, okay?” I said as I jiggled it making sure that it stung much more this way.
The stench of piss filled the room, I pulled my knife out shaking my head.
“A whole pussy but he’s so ready to be a predator and do all sorts of creepy-ass shit to kids? I should rip his dick off right’ now!” Beau screamed out and spat on the floor.
I chuckled as I put the knife back and decided to dislodge the bullet with my hands. I knew how to do it quick and easy but why would I? I took my sweet time as I blocked out the crying coming from him. I sighed, as I took my fingers out and the bullet. I stepped back,
