Page 50 of California Love Songs
“Well then,” she said, “I don’t feel so bad telling you that you make a mean plate of scrambled eggs.”
There was a pause, and then Damien reached across the table and took her hand. She glanced up to find him looking at her in a way that stirred her blood. Again.
“So… I did not see this coming. When you used to get me my first gigs in high school, I got to know you as a friend. You’ve been one of my closest friends—my best friend—for a long time. I never thought we’d?—”
She swallowed hard. Was he already ending it? She had to ask. “Are you sorry it happened?”
His look of shock was so real that there was no faking it. “Are you kidding me? Last night was—I don’t even have the words. It felt like… when we were dancing. That incredible chemistry and the way we moved together felt so right, like I knew your body. It was… everything.”
She felt the same way. Intimacy with Damien was like nothing she’d ever experienced in her life. Given that he must have been with an enormous number of women compared to the few men she had slept with, she was incredibly happy that his world had also been rocked.
“I had a good time, too,” she said, determined to keep her voice casual. For now, that was enough. So they’d both had great sex. That was wonderful, but it couldn’t change reality, which was that Damien would be gone long before she was ready to say goodbye.
She was suddenly conscious that she was in his house in the morning. He probably had a lot of stuff to do. Plus, she had her own business to run. She glanced up at the clock. It was still pretty early. Just after seven.
“What time are you expecting Opal?” she asked, deliberately bringing them back to reality.
He shook his head. “We never arranged a time. I’ll check in with her. She doesn’t have a car, so I might need to go and get her.”
Crystal shook her head. “No, that’s a terrible idea—the paps will still be circling. I can pick her up and bring her over. Or I’m sure Erin or Jay could do it. Let’s not give the paps any material.”
He looked a little bashful. “You’re absolutely right. I don’t know what I was thinking.” He paused. “Maybe I’m a little tired from last night.” He settled back, looking very pleased with himself. “You’re welcome to stick around. In fact, it’s probably easier if you do, because then no one can think anything’s going on with me and Opal.”
Crystal was both flattered and horrified. She did not want the rest of the world to find out she’d slept with Damien Davenport before she even had time to process it herself. So she shook her head. “I want to keep a low profile myself. And I still have Mila’s wedding to plan, I’ll have you know. Between you and me, I’m expecting her to be one of my more demanding clients.”
He laughed at that. “Mila definitely knows exactly what she wants, and she tends to go for it. But she’s hired the best. If I know my sister, she’ll be smart enough to let you be excellent at your job while she goes around being excellent at hers.”
He finished his bowl and then sat back, looking whimsical. “You know, it’s funny… Since I’ve been talking to you about playing jazz, I was thinking about how people change. I always thought I could never do anything but play rock and roll, and yet, look at Mila. We all thought she could never do anything but surf. It was her life. It was her passion. It was her job. And then she lost it all.”
Crystal remembered that time, and how difficult it had been for the badly injured Mila to accept that her surfing career was over. To heal in body and spirit and then find a new path.
Damien was obviously thinking along the same lines. “Sure, she wallowed for a little bit, but she picked herself up and put herself back together. And now she’s a top Realtor. I’m not saying she doesn’t miss the circuit, but she still surfs. She’s got a great life. And she didn’t even choose it. Me, I’m choosing to take a different path. How cool is that?”
She loved his optimism. She sat up straight, catching his enthusiasm the way Mila caught those waves. “I think it’s very cool. Also brave.”
He shrugged. “If it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out. But I don’t want to live life with regrets.”
Those words hit more deeply than Damien could have known. In her case, it wasn’t regret over her career she was worried about. It was regret over letting herself become intimate with a man who could never give her what she really wanted. But at least she knew what she was doing. She was going in with her eyes open. And if she was determined about one thing, it was that when he tired of her physically, they would still keep the friendship that meant so much to her and which she believed meant so much to him, too.
He cocked an eyebrow at her. “Speaking of people being brave enough to follow their dreams and change their careers, have you done anything about applying for college?”
Suddenly flustered and defensive, she felt cornered. Like Mila, her dream of being a doctor had effectively been taken away from her. She’d seen it as one of those sad regrets that people have in life and then they move on. She had mourned not being able to take that path, but now Damien had gone and led her back to that fork in the road. He made her feel like medical school and a career in medicine were actually possibilities. And when she’d talked to her mom, she had also been supportive.
Still, she hadn’t acted on the idea.
She grimaced. “I’ve been thinking it over. Sometimes I think I’m too old to go to med school. By the time I get there, all the other students will be at least a decade younger than me.”
“Sure. But you also have way more life experience than those kids who’ve never seen the world outside of a textbook. You’re well organized, crazy smart, and have a lot of energy. I think you’re the perfect candidate.”
She loved that he was being so supportive and honestly, he was right. Going back to school shouldn’t scare her. So why did it? Was she afraid of stepping out of her comfort zone? Was she afraid to try? Was she afraid to fail?
Or… was she afraid to make a fool of herself in front of the man she loved?
Ouch. She had to accept that last possibility might be the truth.
“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” He’d known her so long that he didn’t miss much where she was concerned.
But right now she didn’t feel like talking about her fear of failure. She just wanted to enjoy the moment. “I’ve been busy. I’ll go over to the college and look into registering.”
