Page 55 of The Casualty of Us
“There has to be fear!” I immediately fill my chest with another deep breath to point out… “Society would fall apart without it, and all that supposed love and loyalty would lead to nothing but anarchy.”
“Right.” He nods easily, as if he’s agreeing with me, before tossing out words that sound exactly like the opposite. “So are you saying there’s no room for empathy in a society? No space for feelings or compassion?”
“I’m saying there have to be consequences!”
He leans back in his chair, hazel eyes practically crawling into mine now. “What about forgiveness?”
And there it is, the hitting of the nail on the head.
The point of this whole stupid debate of two.
Him pushing me before I’m fucking ready because he’s trying to finagle me into a situation of granting forgiveness that he doesn’t deserve.
“But.” he pauses. “You probably agree that the end justifies the means too, right?”
Him trying to start a fight so that he can get back under my skin, and fuck him for it all because…
“I don’t know.” I cross my arms again, cocking my head right back. “Why don’t you tell me? How were the means? Did they get you to that blissful end?”
Lisette sucks in an audible breath next to me even as someone else in the class chuckles. “Oh, shit.”
“Right, of course.” Hayes lifts a hand to his hair with a sharp puff of laughter. “How could I forget? It’s all about that for you, because as long as you reach your ends…” He drops the hand from his head. “Fuck all to everyone else—”
“Mr. Flynn!”
“Oh, fuck off!”
“Ms. Fitzroy!”
“Because they’re supposed to just say thank you—”
“You’re supposed to accept the consequences!”
Fuck.
“Excuse me!”
Mrs. Long claps her hands, but it’s too late.
It’s already been said. I let the knife slip out into the world.
No take-backs.
And the twinkle that sparks deep in the still pissed gaze I’m staring into lets me know that my slip definitely hasn’t gone unnoticed.
Fuck.
Chapter Fifteen
OPHELIA - JANUARY 2013
I dropmy backpack to the ground and plop down beside Holden at our table in the library with a scowl on my face. Staring straight ahead and letting my eyes slide over the titles of the books lining the stacks there. I replay my own stupid, stupid words from debate in my head, with my stomach dropping further each time they make another pass.
At least I managed to ignore him for the rest of class. That’s something, I guess.
But the wrecking ball is more clever than I gave him credit for originally, or maybe not clever, but…he studied me. All week. Calculated.
Each time that stupid hazel gaze landed on me, he was playing his own game. Assessing his opponent. Waiting till he got me alone. Planning the right moment and topic that I couldn’t resist going toe-to-toe with him on.
