Page 188 of The Casualty of Us
It’s going to hurt him, even after everything she’s already put him through. It’s still going to cut deep. That kind of betrayal from the person who brought you into this world can’t not hurt, because it’s the one person who’s supposed to love you unconditionally—and I hate it for him.
Hate that it’s the one thing that I can’t fix here.
It’s what had me dragging Mia clear across town on Christmas Eve after shopping to stop by my other favorite bakery and betray Zoey…but some things only honey cake can fix, and this is one of them.
So I bought one for everyone else and one for me, telling myself that I’ve more than earned it. Hoping that it and some eggnog help soften the blow if Hayes is mad at me.
Because I’m not sure I could really take that right now.
Survive it? Sure, but it’ll hurt like a bitch on the heels of everything else. Having to work through that…I just don’t know which way he’s going to land, though, because the mommy issues are there, but—
Fuck. I just really hope he isn’t mad.
I’m almost shaking by the time I make it to the guest room door, mind and body both completely spent but not trusting anyone else with this delivery. The pain from last night is now a constant pulse between my legs that has me wincing with every step, but I still lift a hand and push the door open to step inside. My eyes immediately find all the other bags stacked neatly at the foot of the bed that’s covered in a navy satin duvet. The rest of the room, with its dresser and desk done in a scheme of creams, just highlights the warm shades of the guy currently lying on top of it.
His face looking all kinds of torn as he stares at me with an arm propped behind his neck and wearing some of Ollie’s borrowed sweats.
“Hi,” I try lamely, swallowing at the little crack in my voice and dropping my eyes to run over all the bags again before frowning. “Damn, the TV isn’t here yet.”
A beat passes before his gravelly voice fills the room suddenly. “The TV—” The low note to it makes me jerk my gaze back up and I see him swing his legs off the bed. Already taking that first step by the time he’s standing with his eyes neverleaving mine and not stopping until he’s in front of me. Leaving barely any space between us and clearly all kinds of pissed as he takes me in. “Want to tell me why my dad called about an hour ago wondering why he just received a certified letter notifying him of my change of address?” He lifts a brow. “And that was just to start?”
“David worked faster than I thought.” I frown harder. “I’ll have to find out if you tip lawyers of questionable ethic—”
“Ophelia,” he breathes harshly, stepping into me and making me tip my head back to see some of the hardness on his face start to crack. “If you didn’t look dead on your feet right now, I swear I’d drag you right back to the shower for this.” His hand reaches for the one of mine that’s holding the guitar case, taking it from me gently with a drop of his brows. “What’s this?”
“Merry Christmas,” I breathe, shifting on my feet a little. “I know you love to play, and I wanted you to have somewhere safe to always do that, okay?” His face falls with another crack, and I clear my throat quickly. “A space that’s just yours too, that isn’t even mine.” I barely resist the urge to just drop where I am and instead shuffle to the side before looking past him to the bed longingly. “I’m going to sit down now.”
Not wanting to be rude or ignore him but quite literally unable to stay on my feet any longer and not thinking passing out is going to help the situation at all.
“Fucking hell,” he curses, voice going from gravelly to outright growly as the sound of the guitar being set down has me glancing back to catch the warning look he gives me. “You are in so much trouble, Freckles.”
Right before he drops down, picking me up with one of his arms snagging me under the legs and the other going behind my back. My gaze stays on his through it all, and my arms go around his neck automatically despite the tumble my stomach does that has me checking quietly. “You’re mad at me?”
He pauses, eyes dropping to run over my face and turning even more unhappy before coming back up with a soft. “Furious.”
“Shit.”
The curse leaves me as he looks away to take that first step, and I wince at the little twinge between my legs it brings. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you what I was doing, okay?” I try to explain the order of events. “I started looking into a way to get you out from under her before summer and—
“Before summer?” His gaze jerks to mine as he crosses the threshold of the guest bath, holding there until I nod quickly and another sharp scoff leaves him. “Jesus Christ.” He makes it to the built-in marble counter on the left, and I open my mouth to argue when his arms tighten around me with a low order. “You wait here.”
Not giving me a second before he sets me down on the counter and turns to the giant bath sitting in the middle of the room. The shower is tucked on the other side with the toilet behind the door on its right and all of it continues the cream and navy scheme of the bedroom. He comes to a quick stop beside the tub, each motion measured and tight while reaching down to flip the drain closed before turning the hot water on. Pretty much tempting me with heaven right about now as he runs his hand underneath the stream a few times. Waiting until he’s apparently satisfied with the temperature before turning back to me.
His gaze settles against mine, and the love that’s still there eases something inside of me enough to finally let go of the wall I’ve been carrying between me and the world today. It gives way to a vulnerability that he seems to be able to reach so easily now, one that has my lower lip trembling all over again even as I whisper. “I know I can be a lot, okay?”
His brows shoot down sharply. “That’s not what I—”
“I can.” I nod, biting my lip quickly and watching him move back toward me before gasping. “I know I can,” The words start to rush out of me as he comes closer. “I just wanted you to have an escape hatch from her at first, but then after seeing everything—” I gasp for a breath, and he stops slowly in front of me. “I knew I had to tell you too.”
“Why didn’t you?” He places a hand on either side of my hips and leans in. “Tell me when you found out she was stealing.”
“I only found out that she was still doing it after Thanksgiving.” I shrug, knowing it doesn’t justify not saying anything immediately but still giving him all the thoughts in my head because he deserves them. “Everything else had been in the past before that, and there wasn’t anything I could do to change that and—” I blink rapidly to fight the way my eyes are trying to fill with tears. “I knew it would break your heart.” My voice cracks over the confession. “And I didn’t want to hurt you.”
“Baby.” His face twists for a beat before he reaches for mine with his thumbs automatically caressing my cheeks. “The only person who could break my heart is you, all right?”
I jerk a quick nod, everything seeming to suddenly give way inside of me and making me gasp. “Okay.” My voice goes all uneven no matter how hard I try to fight as that sense of safety he brings settles around me fully for the first time today. “And thank you for loving me anyway, by the way.”
“Ophelia Sage,” he hums on a low note, amusement flaring in the hazel holding mine. “Only a fool wouldn’t love you.” His thumb drops to run over my bottom lip. “I love you more today than I thought was possible yesterday.”
