Page 163 of The Casualty of Us
Totally craving her baked goods since my other indulgence is currently on the other side of the country.
“Apple praline scones with a caramel drizzle and cinnamon-glazed crumb cake.”
“Please get both,” Talan mumbles quickly, making me roll my eyes but absolutely agree because I’m definitely about to start my period too.
“I’ll take a dozen scones and a whole crumb cake along with my chai, please.”
“Not holding back today.” She arches her brow. “I approve.”
“Well, it is Thanksgiving.” I grin while tapping my card against the reader, knowing what comes next but still having to force myself through the motion of turning to Talan. “Will you grab the stuff when it’s ready? I have to pee real quick.” His gaze fills with suspicion, but I hold it, seeing the struggle play out there and eventually sighing dramatically. “It’s literally like ten feet away.” I lift my wrist to show him I’m wearing the bracelet they gave me. “And I’m covered, see?”
Weaving the truth into the lie to make it more believable and because I’m not enough of an idiot to play games with a psycho and not cover my ass in some way.
He eventually nods in resignation, probably not wanting to ruin the good vibes we’ve had recently and somewhat purposefully on my part. “If you’re not out in five minutes, then I’m coming in.”
“Fine,” I snort, rolling my eyes at him again before turning and heading for the bathroom at the back of the store that I’ve visited on one other occasion. Trying to push every bit of softness from me with that first step and banning the boys from my mind with my next. Because I’m going to have to keep myself in check to pull this off.
After this…the next part will be easier.
That’s if he actually took that bait to begin with, though. This could all still be a wild goose chase as of now, which somewhat helps curb my guilt from keeping it from said boys. Not all of it, though. No matter how hard I try. It’s right there in the pit of my stomach as I push the bathroom door open and get a flash of Hayes doing the same back in his dorm. The memory leftover from the night I spent with him freshman year on what was a decidedly happier Halloween than my most recent one.
I push back against it, though.
Knowing that he would absolutely spank me for this.
I leave the door of the single bathroom unlocked and immediately go for the little window that sits high in the ceiling between the toilet and sink. Placing my feet on the edge of both before I haul myself up and thanking Lisette dearly for all the extra cheer workouts this semester that have helped me build some upper body strength. I blow out a breath while clinging to the small brick edge below the window, not giving myself more time than that before reaching to flick the lock open.
Really hoping that no one decides to try to rob my little café tonight and checks to see if this window is unlocked before Zoey notices it.
Fuck. That would definitely add to the guilt.
I’m too far in it to turn back now, though.
So I slide the window open, standing on my tiptoes and reaching my hands down to clutch at the brick on the outside before starting to scoot out as quickly as possible. My body is practically on autopilot from how many times I’ve run over this in my head when I can’t sleep at night and I pass through easily enough at first. Aiming straight for the ground with only my hips getting caught in a struggle with the window that has me wiggling for a couple more seconds. Finally popping free and falling until I manage to hook my feet on the wall behind me. I quickly reach down to have my hands planted before letting the cards that are myself fall where they may essentially, rolling as I land in the back alley nestled between the collection of buildings.
The fall is jarring no matter how much I try to cushion it and leaves me stumbling for a single step on my way back up. Trying to shake off the bloom of pain in my shoulder as the sweat on my skin turns cold in the autumn air. I push through it to reach for the window again, digging my nails into the brick and wedging a foot between a crack in it to get the leverage I need to slide it closed. Every pump of my heart suddenly pushing me harder and leaving me holding my breath until it’s done.
Knowing that I don’t have much time.
It has me dropping down as soon as the window finally shuts and launching into a sprint. Pumping my legs hard and hauling ass to the end of the alley before immediately sprinting to the left. I count the time in my head and estimate that I have about two minutes left to work with. After that…all bets are off, and if Talan finds out, then everyone will find out, and my ass will probably be shipped off to some far corner of the world in the name of safety.
I force myself back into a fast walk when the postal place’s door comes into sight, eyes darting nervously to the café right next door before I pull it open and step inside. The guy behind the counter waves to me as he helps another customer, the sight of him making my brows fall because it’s definitely not Cara, but I don’t have time to investigate it further right now either.
I run my eyes along the wall of boxes in search of PO Box 338 and dig in the pocket of my leggings for the key, finding the box about a quarter of the way down the third row and immediately going for it while trying to keep my movements measured. Not draw too much attention to myself. Sticking the key into the antique-looking box and turning until I hear a click before pulling the small door open and—
I stop breathing for a second.
Just a second but I can’t help because…it worked. It actually worked.
It has something sick working its way up my throat, heart clenching and kicking in my chest as my fingers close around the thick card stock of the envelope.
Exactly like the one that came with the first bouquet of flowers in the town car.
I swallow down the feeling and close the box, turning the lock before shoving the key back into my pocket. Running my eyes quickly over the shop again while turning to head back to thedoor and reminding myself to keep breathing. To not even think about the thing clutched between my fingers right now or how the guy behind the counter shoots me a smile and how his black hair makes me miss Hayes for a split second.
Because all that has no place here.
Instead I run through the entire process of going to the bathroom in my head while pulling the door open and taking that first step toward the café next door. Washing my hands even as I shove the note into the back of my leggings and pull my thermal back into place over it. Drying them while blowing out a breath and finishing closing the distance to the café door. Coming out and looking around for Talan while pulling it open and—
