Page 100 of Sweet on You
He wiggled his eyebrows. “It will be by the time I’m done with it. So… what can I get you?”
Neil Evans… he hadn’t changed at all since high school. “Just an Americano, please.”
He started up the espresso machine and as it filled a cup with dark brew, he took out a cupcake and handed it to me. I held out a hand and shook my head. “No thanks. It’s a little early for that much sugar.”
He wiggled the cupcake. “It’s sugar-free. I make them for my mom and usually put a couple behind the counter.” He leaned in closer, whispering, “But they never sell.”
I said a quick thank you, and took the cupcake and the Americano, sliding into the seat next to Lydia. She eyed me carefully. “What’s wrong?” she asked.
“What? Nothing. Why do you say that?”
“Because… it’s a Thursday morning and you’re sitting here having coffee with me.”
“So?”
“So… you’re a workaholic like me. A leisurely coffee date on a work day isn’t like you. Not to mention, you’ve agreed to a manicure… also not like you. You’re holding acupcake… do I need to go on?”
I huffed a sigh and took a sip of my Americano. “No,” I grumbled. “Lex and I had our first fight,” I admitted.
“Ohhhh.” She shrugged it off in a casual way that I wished I could emulate. “Who’s at fault?”
I swallowed a gulp of my coffee. “I think I am.” No… I know I am.
Lydia sighed. “You’ll apologize. And you’ll get through it.”
“Maybe. He did text last night that he missed me.” I shrugged.
“See?” Lydia gently nudged me with her elbow. “You two will be okay.”
“I don’t know. I said some really awful things.”
“About him?”
“Indirectly. I was talking about his ex and her addiction, not being able to trust her because of her history…”
Lydia winced. “And he’s a recovering addict, too, right?”
I nodded. “The difference is he hasearnedall of our trust.”
“And she hasn’t…”
“Well, she’s currently in jail awaiting her trial for stealing cars.”
“Yikes,” Lydia said, making a face.
“See? It’s not just me.”
There was a long pause as we sipped our coffee. “But…” Lydia said. “We never knew Lex when he was actively using. He might have been just like she is now. Worse even… and look how great he turned out?”
I blew out a tight breath, watching the steam rising from my coffee twist and curl around itself. “Yeah. But maybe he wasn’t as bad as her.”
Lydia shrugged. “I know it sucks, but it’s not really your call here. If he wants to give her a chance to prove herself to him, to her parents, to her daughter, then your job is to be there for him. Love him. Support him. And not say I told you so if it doesn’t go well the first or second try.”
“I’m not really sure I can ever be okay with her in our lives. I know she has to be, but… it makes me so uncomfortable.” The lump lodged in my throat and white hot tears sprang to my eyes. “And the bigger problem?” I sniffed, staring at the tabletop. “Even in my own relationship, it’s like I’m not an equal partner. If Lex and I really commit, get serious, hell, even get married… what is my role with Olivia? I’m not her mom. I don’t have a say in her upbringing… yet, I’ll be the one doing all the mom things, especially if Sarah does keep falling off the wagon and landing in and out of prison.” I paused, swiping a tear from my cheek. “I’ll have all the duties of mom with none of the perks.”
Lydia’s hand slid over mine and squeezed. “I understand,” she said. “I’m not Maddie’s biological mom, either, you know?”
“Yeah, but her birth mom isn’t in the picture still. It’s not like you’re walking on eggshells, unsure of what your role is.”
