Page 54 of His Beloved Princess
The lady on the other side immediately sent help, but we couldn't drag Bastian back on the road. It was another obstacle the paramedics had to fight with when they arrived. And at the back of my mind, I knew we were almost out of time.
27
In the Hospital Bed
Electra
Iwalked into the hospital through the back entrance, feeling like I was stuck in the most horrifying nightmare. Images of Bastian lying on the ground, pale and unconscious, were burned into my brain. I will never forget the helplessness I felt when the paramedics gave him CPR because his heart had stopped beating.
I was told he probably had some internal bleeding and needed surgery, but because of the terrain, the helicopter couldn’t land. So the ambulance had to drive him through the forest while they tried to keep him alive long enough to transport him to the hospital.
They managed. Bastian arrived an hour before me, and he was at the surgery, yet his life was in critical condition. No one could say how big his chances for survival were.
I stopped at the entrance hall, looking out the floor-to-ceiling windows at the reporters outside. News about our crash traveled at the speed of light, and the press was going crazy about it.
I sighed heavily, hiding my shaking hands in the pockets of my wet jacket. I was barely holding myself together. My eyes burned from tears, the blood rushing inmy ears was deafening, and I couldn’t breathe because of the lump in my throat. Fear for the man I loved was holding me in its tight embrace, disarming me.
I did my best to stay optimistic, but the reality of Bastian’s situation was horrible. We spent the night in the car. I knew he suffered some injuries, yet I didn’t notice how severe they were. If I’d even suspected internal bleeding, I would have run through the forest in the middle of the night to get him help. I wouldn’t have cared about his opinion or his anger. I would never have let this become so serious.
I inhaled a shaky breath, slowly walking past a few nurses who watched me with concern. I probably looked like I would faint at any minute, but I had to function. I had to be strong for him.
He would survive. He would never give up. If not for anyone, he would fight to get back to me.
I repeated those sentences in my head over ana over again just to get my mind away from reality. If I succumbed to my thoughts and fears, I wouldn’t be able to face the world. I was too scared to think about the possibility of him dying. I wasn’t prepared to end our relationship; losing him completely was out of the question.
I walked down the long corridor and stepped into the elevator, giving the impression of a ghost. I didn’t pay attention to anyone or anything around me. My mind was with Bastian. My every thought belonged to him. I even started to consider praying. I was never religious, but in my current state, I was willing to do anything to help him.
I entered the waiting room of the ICU with my head hung low, thinking that I should visit a bathroom because I was afraid I might start throwing up. The world was spinning, and I had to lean against the wall. Otherwise, I would have collapsed.
“Electra!”
A deep voice cut through my brain like a sharp knife, and for a second, I was sure it was Bastian. However, I quickly realized his brother Andreas had taken me by my elbow so I didn’tcollide with the floor.
“Did the doctors check you up? You were with Bast in the car, right?”
I was staring into the same eyes as my beloved man had, unable to answer Andreas’ questions. I was physically and mentally drained. I couldn’t form a simple sentence. My trembling legs couldn’t support my weight any longer, and I hastily grabbed the first thing in my reach to find my balance. I was a few seconds away from losing consciousness.
“Easy, girl,” Andreas mumbled somewhere on my right side, cradling me in his arms before something happened to me. I closed my eyes, barely noticing loud sobs were escaping me as he carried me somewhere. I didn’t know where he was taking me, and honestly, I didn’t care. I hid my face in his chest, crying, totally breaking down.
An excruciating pain in my chest, along with fear and guilt, was tearing me apart, leaving nothing behind. I was hiding those feelings from anyone I met on the ride to the hospital. But I couldn’t hold them any longer.
Bastian would’ve been safe, working in his office and not fighting for his life, if it weren’t for me. All of this happened because of my stupid escape and because I couldn’t face him. I didn’t want to hear his explanation. I didn’t try to solve the problem like an adult. Instead, I ran away and made my own conclusions based on stupid presumptions.
If I could just turn back time, I would have waited for him for eternity until he returned home, and we would have talked and gotten through this.
Fuck! Why, at least for once, couldn’t I stop overthinking everything and give him the benefit of the doubt? We would have argued, and we would have yelled, but eventually, because we loved each other, we would have gotten the same result without the crash and him being at the OR.
“Give her something so she can calm down.”
A soft feminine voice interrupted my mental suffering, and I slowly opened my eyes, seeing nothing but a black suit jacket. I couldn’t tell who was speaking, but she sounded familiar, yet I was too tired to muse about her.
Andreas gently placed me on a hospital bed, and I turned my back on him, weeping into the white sheets. I should probably have asked about Bastian’scondition, but I was so scared by the news that I kept my mouth shut, hoping he was still alive.
“Give me your arm, sweetheart.”
The face of the man standing next to the bed was blurry, but I understood he was a doctor. I extended my arm towards him, and a warm hand rolled up my sleeve. In a second, I felt a sting from the needle. I was grateful for some drugs to put me out of my misery.
I’d never been in such a bad state, yet deep in my mind, I knew that if Bastian died, I would be much worse.
