Page 30 of Crybaby
“Why you not come dance?” he asked, eyes bright and sharp.
Jason smiled at him. “I’m good, just wanna catch up with the guys. You have fun—that Matt guy seems cool.”
“Mark.”
“Huh?”
“The guy. Name Mark.”
“Oh, right. Mark.”
Sasha stared at him for a moment. “If you catching up, then why you look at me with Mark so much?”
Jason blinked up at him. “I’m just making sure you’re okay.”
“No,” Sasha denied with complete certainty. “You jealous.”
Now it was Jason’s turn to stare. A sudden, obliterating wave of exhaustion hit him, sweeping through him and ransacking all his carefully constructed rationalizations and reducing them into foolish pieces.
“Jealous of what, Sasha? You’re not mine.”
“No, but you want.”
The words hit Jason like a physical blow. For a long moment, he was too breathless to say anything. When words came, they were low and angry. “Don’t be cruel.”
Sasha’s eyes widened. “Jason—”
Jason didn’t want to hear anymore. He turned towards the group, smiling apologetically, the expression sticking awkwardly to his face. “Hey, guys, sorry but Imma head out.”
Everybody frowned, looking like they were going to protest—he’d been there for barely more than an hour—but Alyssa cut them off. “Okay, dude. Let’s catch up soon, yeah?”
Jason nodded. “Yeah,” he agreed, meaning it.
He muscled his way out of the club without looking at Sasha, and the fresh air outside was a balm that stung.
He started walking at once, needing to get away before he even thought about calling a car. But of course,of course, Sasha was right on his heels.
“Jason.”
“Just forget about it, Sasha. Go and have fun. I just want to go home,” he said without turning back.
Sasha was obviously not having it, catching up to him and jumping in front to block Jason’s path. “No.”
“No, what?” Jason asked, exasperated. What the fuck did Sashawant? Hadn’t Jason given enough of himself to this whole goddamn situation?
“Let’s talk, okay?”
“I want to go home. We can talk later.”
“I go home with you.”
“No, just…not this time. Just…go. Have fun. I’ll see you on Monday.”
This time, when Jason left, Sasha let him.
**********
Jason stared into space, trying to get his mind to shut up. He’d barely turned any lights on when he’d arrived home and was sitting on his couch in the gloom, feeling sorry for himself.
