Page 72 of Rat Park
Summer seemed to pass in the blink of an eye. Even with the guilt eating at Dominic at the thought of keeping what Flor and he were doing from Cat and Esteban, it was one of the best seasons in Dominic’s memories. Dominic got to be around Flor almost every day, got to keep, for a little while, Flor’s smiles and gesturing hands, the way his freckles multiplied under the sun, his voice and snark and his secret expressions.
At night, or in the morning, or the middle of the day, Dominic got to have Flor’s touches, his moans and his blush, and Dominic let himself be thankful even though he knew it wouldn’t last.
Dominic and Flor spent almost every day together when Dominic wasn’t at work. Flor took him out so that Dominic experienced the town he had lived in all his life in a way he never had before. They took walks along streets, through the park, on the beach. They went to the cinema, and Dominic tried not to balk at the price, his spirit still frugal despite the bump in wages now that he had experience working in the shop.
He tried to pretend having all this didn’t hurt, and it almost worked.
**********
The date Flor was booked to leave back to college approached inescapably. It remained an unspoken subject until its silence couldn’t hold out any longer.
Flor had insisted he could cook breakfast-for-dinner himself, so Dominic sat by his kitchen counter, watching Flor dance around the small kitchen in short shorts.
“There,” Flor proclaimed as he plated the food with flair. “The masterpiece is done.”
Dominic took the plates dutifully to the living room, where they both settled on the couch to eat in front of the TV. Dominic bit into the food, schooling his expression. The scrambled eggs were salty, the bacon chewy, the French toast undercooked.
Flor made a displeased sound. “It’s bad,” he muttered, looking down at the food.
“I like it,” Dominic said.
“You’re lying to me,” Flor accused, throwing him a look.
Dominic shrugged, proceeding to eat the whole meal as Flor watched him, a slight blush on his cheeks. When Dominic was done, he set the plate down on the coffee table, giving Flor a look that said,There.
Flor shook his head, but he was smiling as he set his own half-uneaten food next to Dominic’s plate. He crawled into Dominic’s lap, straddling him and leaning down for a kiss. Dominic stroked the soft skin over Flor’s hips until Flor settled back, looking at Dominic.
Silence settled between them, comfortable except for the odd look on Flor’s face. Dominic waited him out, a trickle of trepidation filling his gut.
“So. I’m leaving in a few days,” Flor said eventually, voice quiet. Dominic felt his biceps clench as if he wanted to clutch Flor to him, but he cut the movement off at the elbows.
“Yeah.”
Flor looked at him, a frown lowering his brows. “Is that all you’ve got to say?”
Dominic stared back. He had no idea what else there was to say. Flor licked his lips, eyes darting away for a moment before looking steadfastly back.
“I think we should do the long-distance thing,” Flor said, voice hard, almost challenging. Now it was Dominic’s turn to frown, confused.
“How are we supposed to sleep together when you’re in college?”
Flor huffed. “Jeez, we don’t have to sleep together all the time, do we?”
Now Dominic really was confused. “I’m pretty sure a friends-with-benefits relationship is just friendship if we don’t sleep together, Flor,” Dominic reasoned.
Flor stared at him. Dominic didn’t understand the hurt flickering across Flor’s face.
“Friends with benefits,” Flor said flatly.
“…Yeah?”
Flor scrambled off Dominic’s lap and onto the couch next to him. “Friends with benefits,” he said again, his expression closing off in increments.
Dominic raised his hands slowly as if to defend himself. Something bad was happening. He just wasn’t sure what.
“I am such a fucking idiot,” Flor muttered, pressing his fists to his face.
“Flor, I don’t understand.…You need to tell me why you’re upset, because I’m obviously missing something,” Dominic pleaded. When Flor didn’t speak, Dominic tried to guess, desperate to get Flor to uncurl from his defensive, hurt position.
