Page 8 of All That Has Flown Beyond
They’d had no reason to question it.
CHAPTER TWO
Kaiyo stopped the car as he felt the wards straining around him.
“Motherfuckers,” he trembled. He punched the steering wheel, the horn blaring out once before everything fell silent again. Wards didn’t usually stop someone from physically crossing them unless specifically tuned to that person.
He took a deep, shaking breath. It should have beenhiswards around the pack house. The land should be loyal tohim. But most shifter packs were tied to pieces of land, and the severing ritual had exiled Kaiyo even from the earth underneath his feet.
He hit the steering wheel horn again and again and again, mindless with frustration and loss. He was drowning in the thick water of it.
“Kaiyo.”
Kaiyo jumped, his fist dropping from the wheel. He looked through the windshield. Thea stood in the middle of the dirt path leading to the Garrow House. The path he could no longer go down.
Kaiyo jumped out from the car, heart already racing. He didn’t care if Thea could hear it, could smell the sweat of his desperation.
“Thea. You have to help me,” Kaiyo pleaded.
Thea’s eyes flickered away for a moment, but her posture was stiff and proud. She didn’t reply.
“Thea. Come on. You know this isn’t right,” Kaiyo said, taking a gasping step forwards against the solid hand of the wards.
“Stop, Kaiyo. You’re hurting yourself.”
“I don’t care. I don’t—”
Thea laughed, shaking her head. “See?”
“No. No, I don’t see. You’ve just fucking kicked me out of the pack, Thea! You and, and—you can’t do this. You can’t do this!”
“What other choice did we have? Kaiyo, you…we’ve tried everything else,” she said. Her voice was soft like there wasn’t even a fight to be won. It made fear spear through Kaiyo.
“Just talk to me. Just—”
“We’ve had this conversation a million times before. You know we have. You don’t listen.”
“I’ll listen. I’m listening.”
“No. You aren’t. Just—”
“Thea.”
“Go. Kaiyo, go. We’re not…” She looked away, biting her lip. Kaiyo didn’t have to have a werewolf’s nose to sense her helpless despair. “You don’t belong to this pack anymore.”
The words were the hardest blow Kaiyo had ever been dealt. It left him breathless for a second, to be told that he didn’t belong in the one place, the one thing, he never thought he would lose.
“Don’t. Please. Thea…” Kaiyo said, but Thea had already turned away. “Wait. Wait! Thea, just—wait,please.I-I want to talk to Ahmik. I’m not leaving until he comes here!” he shouted.
Thea didn’t even pause.
**********
You rest in the hollow cradle of a midnight hour. The day has dealt a series of small, innocuous-seeming blows you can feel now as you lie in your bed. The intrusive thoughts and moments of doubt and restlessness and exhaustion like a trail of ants under your skin. You press against the vulnerable surface of your Ousía, and it is sore and bruised.
You lie there and feel a hollow weight. You are small and tired. The black is distance around you. You’re detached from the world which must be functioning perfectly just on the other side of the membrane of your mind.
You feel the perfect hole of the loneliness between your lungs. It crawls up, squeezing your throat.
