Page 41 of Sicken of the Calm
“No. I mean, yes, I’m cool withdoing it without a condom.”
“Oh, you’recoolwithout acondom,” I can’t help but snort. He smiles down at me a little sheepishly.
“Super cool. Actually, I don’tthink I’ve ever been so cool about anything before.”
“Yeah, ‘cool’ is definitely theworld to describe you right now,” I tease. He mock-frowns at me, but when hekisses me I can feel the shape of his smile against my lips. The urgency hasdiminished a little, leaving a gentler form of anticipation.
Ezra slips two of his fingersinside again, and I moan into his mouth.
“Ezra, I’m ready. Please,” I sayinto his mouth. He hums but moves back. He leans down to the floor a moment,picking up one of the rectangular pillows he bought me a while ago and puttingit at the small of my back. A shiver goes through me as I watch him, the focusin his eyes.
He moves between my legs,grabbing one to drape it over his right shoulder whilst the other is leftflat-footed on the bed, my knee bent and tilted slightly to the side. His righthand grips my hip whilst the other lubes up and then steadies his cock. Heshifts forward. His dark eyes find mine, just watching me as he rubs the tip ofhis dick against my entrance. I squirm and open my mouth, a rush of breathfalling out. My muscles are clenching with the unbearable anticipation of it.
Finally, the head of his dickslides in, but it’s just that, the tip, before he’s out again. I groan infrustration, but he’s pushing in again, a little farther this time. Afterspending time with the toy, with my fingers, with his, this is somewhatfamiliar territory. All of the fear and awkwardness I thought I wouldexperience my first time of penetrative sex is absent, leaving only a burningwant behind. I can’t help but think that this moment, the way I’m feeling rightnow, has been orchestrated by Ezra since the very start.
Ezra fucks into me steadily butslowly, each thrust taking him in a little deeper, the ache growing with thepleasure. There’s something electrifying about the mix of the two, like he’sgiving me double of something I could only have half of. The sight of him, onehand steadying my leg whilst the other grabs my hip, watching him fuck me sointensely, makes me grind back into him, and he’s suddenly all the way in me.He stops for a moment, both of us breathing harshly. Ezra bites his lip, thetendons in his neck standing out in the strain of not moving further.
I can feel him all the way insideme, every inch of him. The fullness goes beyond anything I’ve ever tried. Iclose my eyes a moment to savour it, but it’s not enough.
“Come on. Come on, come on,” Isay, trying to tilt my hips back and fuck myself on him. His hands on me tighten,but he pulls back and slides in again as he finally starts fucking me, albeitwith measured, controlled thrusts.
“Does it hurt?” he asks,breathless.
“Comeon,” I growl,thrusting my hips, and the light in his eyes flickers, changes.
Finally. I feel a jolt ofdelicious fear run through me.
Ezra grabs my other leg, liftingit up and then leaning forward so that my legs bend with my knees toward mychest, my legs over his shoulders. He thrusts in and hits me deep. I moan, andwhen I open my eyes again, his feral grin is back.
He starts fucking me for real. Sharpthrusts that hit my prostate, an incessant barrage that leaves me gasping forbreath. It’s so much, but it’s still not enough, even as he hurtles me forward.
“More, more,” I’m saying, and hebites the word from my mouth before leaning back, digging his hands under myhips and hitching me upwards, fucking into me brutally.
“Ezra,” I groan, grunting in pacewith his thrusts. My dick is bouncing between us, leaking over my abs. Thepleasure is growing deep inside, filling me like he’s filling me. At thisangle, I can do little more than take it.
My hands scrabble at him, nailsraking over his sweating chest. There’s a flush high up on his cheeks,travelling down to his collarbones. His eyes are glowing, the smell of sage andus a bell jar against the rest of the world.
He leans forward again, his kneesreplacing the hands under me to hold me up. His mouth bites at my lips,devouring me, and I realize I was making short, broken noises when they muffleagainst his tongue. His hand wraps around my dick and I moan, writhing, foldedand caged by his body. His thrusts are short and deep now, and just as good. Hekeeps up a steady, hard rhythm aimed unerringly at my prostate, moving againstme like the never-ending wash of the sea.
The pleasure is becomingunbearable. It’s consuming me, from the inside out.
“Ezra, I’m going, I-”
“Yeah. Yeah, come on, baby, comefor me,” he says against my mouth. His hand is sliding tightly around my cock,his dick deep inside me, and I light up. A thousand points of pleasure coalesceinto one and bursts, taking over me. My cock jerks between us as I come. Myarms are wrapped around him. I can feel him breathe against my mouth as I groan.I can feel him everywhere; inside me, pressed against my skin, as the pleasureransacks me.
God, God, if only I could stayhere forever.
He’s still thrusting slowlyinside me as I open my eyes, little bursts of overstimulation sparking insideme. He looks wrecked, eyes wide and hungry still. He kisses me deeply beforemoving back, and I can feel the ache in my knees and thighs as I unfold, but hedoesn’t go far. He continues fucking into me, avoiding my prostate, the slideof him melting into the aftermath of my orgasm. I watch him watch me, my bodysated and simply his. Watch as the flush on his cheeks darken, his hands on mythighs tightening, feel the rhythm of his hips falter until the pleasure takeshim over, too. I get to see his wet lips open as he moans, eyes flutteringclosed as he stills deep inside me. I get to feel him come, filling me up.
I make a little, broken noise aswe still completely.
When he comes back to, he openshis eyes, a soft smile tipping his mouth. Still inside me, he leans forward soI can taste the shape of it, kissing me gently.
“Joaquin,” he says, in that samesoft voice he always uses in these moments. I sigh against his lips.
Carefully, he slides out of me,and I wince slightly at the feel of it. He strokes my thighs as he lowers themuntil I’m spread on the bed, loose-limbed and aching slightly in the best waypossible. He leans over me, kissing me chastely.
“Cool?” he asks, smiling againstmy lips.
